The 16 kinds of bloggers: which one are you?

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There are as many types of bloggers as there are blogs. Here I’m going to describe the 15 different types of bloggers I’ve encountered in the blogosphere. Which one are you?

1. The Self-Therapist.
I began my blogging experience as a member of this category. Having just left a long, abusive relationship, I felt the need to document my journey to recovery after abuse by writing about it. My intuition told me that making my therapeutic journal public for all eyes would ultimately be more beneficial for me than just putting it on WordPad or something. My intuition proved correct and I’ve been able to help others too, just by going public. Now I seem to have moved more in the direction of The General Purpose Blogger (#13). This type of blog has become increasingly common in recent years, probably because of the sagging economy that makes it difficult for many people to be able to access or afford good psychotherapy.

2. The Journalist.
Somewhat related to #1, The Journalist writes about their daily experiences, observations, thoughts, opinions, activities, etc. for the whole world to see. The intention isn’t necessarily self-therapeutic, just a way to express to the world their subjective state or feelings at the time. If well written, these blogs can be brilliant and entertaining slices of life many people can relate to, sometimes rivaling New Yorker essays. But if the writer isn’t careful (or is a terrible writer), such posts could come off as narcissistic or just mind-numbingly boring.

3. The Show-Off.
This may be the most common sort of blog, and they are a dime a dozen. Basically an extension of a Facebook or social media page, Show Offs post blog entries documenting family picnics, children’s school events, Breanne and Jacob’s soccer trophies, the progression of the blogger’s pregnancy, home projects, the Family Trip to Disney World, “what I cooked for dinner for the kids last night using only leftovers,” and other bland minutiae of family life. These would be the infamous “Mommy blogs” that have become so vilified of late. Show Off blogs aren’t just limited to moms though–here you would also find teenagers and young adults posting pictures of their friends making silly faces, documenting their social activities, posting videos of drunken parties, and of course, lots and lots of selfies. Show Off blogs could also include pet lovers posting pictures of Fido sporting his new rubber boots or Fifi in her brand new tutu. In all cases, these sort of blogs are essentially extensions of their social media page. Sometimes these sort of blogs even include a Music Player (always the blogger’s current favorite song) that cannot be turned off when viewing the blog.

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4. The Vindicator.
Not that common, but there are a few blogs that exist solely to “get back” at a person or group of persons they feel offended them personally. Blog entries are basically endless rants against the offending person or group. Occasionally, the person or group attacked will attack back, and blog wars can arise. These kind of blogs tend to be short lived, until the blogger’s rage burns out, or the offending party (now the offended) threatens civil action.

5. The Pundit.
Many blogs are basically political soapboxes for people to spew their political beliefs. Nothing more needs to be said. There are also bloggers on larger news sites such as Huffington Post, who have been given their own license to do the same thing.

6. The Preacher.
Related to The Politician (above), The Preacher’s mission is to convert everyone to their belief system, whatever it may be. These blowhards may quote from the Bible or other religious text excessively to back their views. If you don’t do exactly as they say, you are going to burn in Hell. Disagreement in comments is usually not tolerated, and comments are sometimes not even allowed.

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7. The Expert.
Usually a professional in their field, such a blogger may be a paid guest blogger for a large website. Such experts could be doctors, psychologists, nurses, teachers, finance and business executives, or experts in any other field.

8. The Practical Muse.
These are the “how-to” bloggers, who focus on their hobbies or interests like cooking, gardening, home decor, beauty and fashion, child-rearing, car maintenance, blogging, etc. Sometimes the focus is more specific: bonsai gardening, dessert cookery, antique car maintenance, fashion for wannabe hip hop stars, raising a child with autism, blogging for fame and fortune, etc.

9. The Creative Writer.
These blogs can be either great or terrible. These are the blogs where you’ll find the angsty adolescent poetry, word-salad like prose, bad (or sometimes great) fiction, fan fiction, etc. This category sometimes bleeds over into #1 (The Self Therapist) or #2 (The Journalist).

10. The Hater.
Blogs like these exist to celebrate hatred toward a person (usually a celebrity or other public figure) or group of people. These blogs can be entertaining (if you agree with the prevailing sentiment) or infuriating (if you do not). Unless you are in a agreement, it’s probably best not to comment on these blogs, because you will be mobbed and acquire a new lower orifice in the process. Hater blogs tend to last only as long as the blogger’s passionate ire lasts, so they tend to burn themselves out (or are sometimes forced to be taken down by offended parties).

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11. The Motivational Blogger.
All sweetness and light and positive thinking, 24/7, 365 days a year. Such bloggers focus on inspirational memes, verses, quotes, and sometimes original essays, meant to make you feel inspired or motivated. Unfortunately blogs like these can sometimes have the unintended effect of making you feel like a horrible person or a failure because you’re not that upbeat, happy and successful all the time. Or they can simply be annoying.

12. The Artist.
A showcase for an artist’s creations, showing their paintings, sculpture, photography, jewelry, etc. Sometimes these can also be “Merchant” blogs, if the artwork is for sale.

13. The General Purpose Blogger.
Opinionated Man’s A Good Blog Is Hard to Find (formerly HarsH ReaLiTy) is such a blog. A General Purpose blogger writes about everything. Nothing is off limits. General Purpose blogs tend to become popular due to the fact they attract a large audience who have varying interests. The only problem with blogs of this type is the blogger can be seeming to spread themselves too thin, and the blog seems to lack a focus or sense of cohesiveness and can overwhelm readers with too much information.

This blog seems to be veering in the General Purpose direction too, because I’ve been running out of new things to say about narcissism (and frankly I’m getting a little burned out on the subject too). But it’s always been sort of a general purpose blog anyway, because from the very beginning only about 80% of my articles have been about narcissism or mental health. I’ve always written about other things too. It’s just that lately, “other things” is a larger chunk of the pie.

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14. The Popularity Seeker.
These bloggers just want to get as many views and hits as they can. They want to present an image–a sort of online “false self,” if you will. They are trying to be cool and only write about things they think are cool or “cutting edge,” even if those things don’t really interest them. You can always tell a blog that’s trying too hard to be popular, because it will usually bore you to tears. You can just tell the blogger doesn’t really give a shit about what they’re posting, they just want as much traffic as they can get and want to present an image of something they probably aren’t in real life. Bloggers like these are usually narcissists or people with low self esteem using blogging to try to feel better about themselves.

15. The Merchant/Entrepreneur.
A blogger whose posts are essentially cleverly concealed advertisements for items or services they’re selling. Artist blogs (#12) often (but not always) bleed over into this category.

16. The Fan.
Like #10, fan blogs focus on a celebrity or other public figure, only the blogger is a fan instead of a hater. Haters of the blogger’s object of adoration need not comment.

12 weird things you might see a narcissist do.

It’s been several months since I posted this and since I haven’t written anything new about narcissism in a few days (I’m a little burned out on narcissism right now, to be perfectly honest–but I’m sure that’s temporary), I thought I’d repost this one since it seems to be getting some traction and it’s also one of my favorite posts.
These are all red flags not commonly mentioned and you may not know about, but they can help you identify a potential narcissist.

Be sure to also click on the link at the bottom of the article (5 More Weird Things You Might See a Narcissist Do).

luckyotter's avatarLucky Otters Haven

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There are some strange things I’ve noticed narcissists do that aren’t usually mentioned as symptoms of their disorder, but seem to be common enough perhaps they should be included as additional criteria for NPD.

If you know someone who does only one or two of these things, it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re a narc, but if they do several of them regularly and also seem to fit the more well-known criteria for NPD, these things could be red flags to watch out for.

1. They don’t blink when they look at you.

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Some narcs have a penetrating, predatory gaze. If a person of the opposite sex looks at you this way, you may take it as sexual interest (and it could be), but watch carefully: if they do not blink this could mean they are sizing you up as prey. Whether they blink or not, if their stare makes you…

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Movies about narcissism and psychopathy (new header topic)

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I have so many reviews and commentaries about movies that portray narcissism and other Cluster B disorders such as BPD that I realized it needed to be a topic in the header.
I am not including documentaries in this list, just theatrical films.

Narcissism and Psychopathy

“Risky Business” (1983)

“Ordinary People” (1980)

“Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” (1986)

“We Need to Talk About Kevin” (2011)

Article from another source about movies that portray NPD.
A Streetcar Named Desire
Black Swan
Lucy in the “Peanuts” comic strips (I know it’s not a movie, relax)
Gaslight
Mommie Dearest
Schindler’s List

Borderline Personality Disorder

“Welcome to Me” (2015)

“Mary Jane Harper Cried Last Night” (1977 TV movie)

Other

“Inside Out” (2015) — not really about narcissism, but about emotions and how they work.

12 more songs about narcissists–part 2!

Two additional songs about narcissism were brought to my attention so rather than start a new list, I decided to add them to this older one.
Enjoy! 🙂

luckyotter's avatarLucky Otters Haven

Due to the enormous popularity of my previous articles about this topic (both of which now appear at the top of page one of Google–thanks everyone for making these so popular!), I’m adding ten more songs about narcissists today. Music and narcissism go together well– that’s one good thing narcissism has going for it, I guess. 🙂

The Songs.

1. “The Backstabbers” — The O’Jays

It’s very difficult to find songs about narcissists/psychopaths prior to the 1980s, but here’s an excellent one from the early 1970s.

2. “Ain’t It Fun” — Paramore

Catchy pop offering a badass challenge to a narcissist’s gameplaying.

3. “You Don’t Own Me” — Lesley Gore

Here’s another oldie (from the early ’60s) about a young woman involved with a narcissistic man.

4. “Mr. Know It All” — Kelly Clarkson

A modern take on Lesley Gore’s lament.

5. “Shadowboxer” — Fiona Apple

Apple’s musical poetry eloquently…

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23 things I hate about my life.

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It’s time for a little shameless self pity.

I’m actually not in a negative mood right now, but I was yesterday for awhile and I desperately wanted to vent. It’s great to try to be positive and look at the bright side of things, but to deny the shit in our lives is like denying that sometimes you just have to get it out, whether it’s emotional shit or the other kind. Holding it in is bad for you.

So I’m getting it all out here right now and then moving on.

1. I hate the fact I’m over 50 and make poverty level wages. Being poor does seem to be a common complaint among those of us who were trained to be victims by narcissistic families. We just never learned how to navigate the world and lack the confidence to do it very well.

2. I hate the fact I have a job that has nothing to do with what I really love and don’t really know how I can parlay writing into a career.

3. I hate that I love the beach, live so far away from it, and can’t afford to go. I haven’t been to the beach in six years.

4. I hate the fact I want to date again but am terrified of that prospect too. I don’t want to die alone but worry no one would want to stay with me.

5. I hate the fact I have no health insurance and can’t afford to buy any. I don’t qualify for Obamacare because my income is too low and this state won’t allow me to get Medicaid. We do have a free medical clinic in town but I hate the condescending way they treat you there.

6. I sometimes wonder why the hell I ever moved to this state, although it’s really not so bad.

7. I hate the way I acted when I was younger and cringe in embarrassment and shame thinking about it sometimes. I want to divorce my younger self sometimes and pretend she never existed, even though I know that to heal, I need to make peace with her and learn to love her.

8. Sometimes I feel like a huge loser in life. Of course this idea has been drummed into me by my narcs and I’ve internalized it. It’s not an easy belief to let go of.

9. I hate the fact I sometimes doubt my faith.

10. I hate the way I sometimes still hurt people without meaning to.

11. I hate feeling like I’m always guilty of something and always have to apologize.

12. I hate that I’m so socially awkward that people sometimes think I’m daft. Having hearing issues on top of Aspergers and Avoidant PD sure doesn’t help with this.

13. I hate how fair I am. I can’t tan anymore (I could as a child and teenager) but at least I don’t have wrinkles.

14. I hate that I had an abortion and never got to meet the son I would have had (it was male and would have been born in March or April of 1999 so he’d be 16 now). At the time I didn’t feel like I had a choice.

15. I hate the fact I spent three months in a mental hospital in 1996 and at the time didn’t take the DBT training very seriously. I kept the books and do now though.

16. I hate the fact I wasted my young adult years chasing men and obsessing over finding the perfect man instead of focusing on my education and training for a real career in journalism.

17. I hate the fact I don’t have any close friends IRL. I won’t let anyone get close to me because I’m afraid if they found out too much about me they would hate me.

18. I hate the fact my family of origin sucked and have never been supportive of me or loved me unconditionally and judge me so harshly.

19. I hate the fact my family thinks my mental disorders are just an excuse and take no interest in them or why I have them.

20. When push comes to shove, I still can’t say I’m really a very happy person. I’ve gotten better but I wonder if I’ll ever really be happy. I’m looking into getting a therapist.

21. I wish I had been a better mom when my kids were young. I still beat myself up over not having been there for them when they needed me most.

22. I hate that I haven’t seen my son in two years because he lives 700 miles away and I can’t afford to travel to see him.

23. I hate it that I still have so much trouble speaking up when I’ve been hurt or standing up for myself when my rights have been violated.

That felt kind of good.

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Best of Lucky Otter’s Haven

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I got this idea from Anna Valerious’ blog Narcissists Suck, who did a similar “Best Of” list. Unfortunately, WordPress no longer allows an “All Time” timeframe for gathering statistics, so this list will only include my most popular (most viewed) posts from 2015.
They are listed in order from most viewed to least.

If an article was a rant about some drama going on at the time and I was just venting, I skipped those for the most part.

The posts about Narcissism and the few about Borderline Personality Disorder that made the Top 50 will be listed separately from the rest. (These are my most popular articles out of a total of about 890 articles since I started this blog last September)

My Narcissism articles have proven to be my most viewed by far.

This post will also become a new static page in the header, which I’ll update on a monthly basis (for the rest of 2015 at any rate).

Most Popular Posts about Narcissism and BPD

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1. A Match Made in Hell: Narcissists and HSPs
2. 20 Songs About Narcissists #11-20 (part 2 of 2)
3. 20 Songs About Narcissists #10-1 (part 1 of 2)
4. Grandiose and Vulnerable Narcissists: How Do They Differ?
5. Famous People Who Have NPD
6. The Distinctive Look of Psychopathy: Gazing Into the Face of Evil
7. Why You Should Never Jump into a New Relationship After Narcissistic Abuse
8. Do Narcissists Cry?
9. 12 More Songs About Narcissism
10. Maybe We Throw Around the “N” Label Too Freely
11. A New Insight on Being the Only Child of a Narcissistic Mother
12. Can a Psychopath Ever Be Cured?
13. My Story of Narcissistic Abuse (Childhood and Adolescence)
14. Narcissism is a Family Disease
15. 12 Weird Things You Might See a Narcissist Do
16. The “Sex Symbol of Narcissism”
17. Sleeping With the Devil: My Marriage to a Psychopath (part 1)
18. Psychopaths and Pets
19. The Man You Love to Hate–or Hate to Love
20. Are You Being Gaslighted?
21. My Mother, the Exhibitionist
22. Letter From a Narcissist’s True Self
23. Narcissists Who Use 12-Step Programs to Further Their Agenda
24. Beware of MNs Posing as Victims in the Psychopathic Abuse Community
25. Disturbing Documentary About Narcissists and Psychopaths
26. Narcissists and Cleanliness
27. 10 Ways to Deal With a Narcissist
28. The Four Types of Narcissistic Abuse Victims
29. Could Reparenting Actually Cure a Narcissist?
30. Healing Narcissism: Stephen’s Story
31. More About the Narcissistic Stare
32. Why Family Scapegoats Become Lifelong Victims
33. The 12 Steps of “Narcissists Anonymous”
34. Sociopath vs. Psychopath: Is There a Difference?
35. Sam Vaknin: Narcissist or Narcissist Wannabe?
36. I Think It’s Iime We Stop Bashing All Narcissists
37. 5 More Weird Things You May See a Narcissist Do
38. Malignant Narcissism and the Supernatural: A Connection?
39. Eight Fun Games Narcissists Like to Play (and One They Can’t Play)
40. It’s All About Image: The Skewed Values of Narcissistic Families
41. Cerebral vs. Somatic Narcissists
42. Are BPD and Complex PTSD the Same Disorder?
43. How To Recognize a Covert Narcissist
44. The Real Reason Highly Sensitive People Get Bullied
45. Do Narcissists Have a Spiritual Purpose We Can’t Understand?
46. Are Narcissists Ever Abuse Victims?
47. Narcissist Parents Demonize Their Own Children
48. Courtney Love, Murderous Psychopath
49. On Narcissists Who Want to Be Cured
50. Do Psychopaths Hate Cats?

I am adding these 10 articles to this list too because they were “bubbling under” the Top 50 and they’re among my personal favorites (these numbers are not their actual rankings, but they are in order from most to least popular):

51. Book Review: “Malignant Self-Love” by Sam Vaknin
52. 22 Signs of Online Destructive Narcissists in Forums and Blogging Communities
53. Why Being a Golden Child Isn’t So Golden
54. Malignant Narcissism in Fairy Tales
55. All My Narcissistic Lovers
56. Lies My Narcissists Told Me
57. Malignant Narcissists: HSPs Gone Bad?
58. Survivor Hypervigilance and The Danger of False Labeling
59. NPD vs. BPD: They Are Not The Same Thing!
60. Ten Great Things About Narcissists

Other Popular Posts

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I have included only the Top 25 here because overall, these articles ranked much lower than my articles about narcissism. A few of these overlap with the subject of narcissism and could appear on either list, but for various reasons I decided to place them here instead.

1. Anyone Remember Merrimints? Well, They’re Back (Sort of)
2. My Favorite Optical Illusions
3. My Son is Furry–Got a Problem With That?
4. On Political Correctness and the Inevitability of Offending People
5. Forever Alone
6. Mid Century Modern Houses > McMansions and Other Neo-Eclectic Monstrosities
7. People Treat Me Like I’m Stupid
8. Blogging is Not For Pussies
9. Scientology: A Cult of Psychopathy
10. 20 Truths of Blogging
11. Road Rage, Bumper Stickers, and Narcissism
12. Why IQ Tests of the Past Lacked Smarts
13. Are Millennials Really the Most Narcissistic Generation Ever?
14. 15 Insane Things I’ve Been Accused Of
15. Who Was Narcissus?
16. 15 Things That Introverts Will Never Tell You
17. How Does Aspergers Syndrome Differ From Non-Verbal Learning Disability?
18. Ten Things That Make Your Blog Suck
19. The Curse of the Aspergers/Avoidant/Borderline Triad
20. Replying To My Haters
21. Ferris Bueller, Psychopath
22. Scrambled Eggs for Brains
23. My Weird Phobia
24. Chronic Rage is a Trap, Not a Trophy
25. The Narcautism Spectrum!

10 Annoying as Shit Things Bloggers Do

If you blog, please DON’T do these things!

12 ways for for non-lazy bloggers to get more hits.

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There are many casual bloggers who only blog for themselves or their friends. They don’t care about views, hits or visibility, and have never looked at their stats page, and that is perfectly okay. Casual bloggers can write one blog post a year and it won’t matter because the few views they get are all they care about anyway. Their sole reason for blogging is to share their thoughts, feelings or pictures with a few friends–or just get them down “on paper,” so to speak. There is, of course, nothing wrong with that.
So if you’re a casual type of blogger who blogs only for yourself or your friends or family, this article will not apply to you.

But if you’re a serious blogger, like I am, you will want to increase your readership, get more views, and be more visible on the web. I think for most of us, the primary reason we blog is for the love of it and to share our thoughts with others, but let’s be honest: that isn’t quite enough. For aspiring writers like me, maximum visibility is important because visibility helps us promote our writing. Blogging can act as a springboard to other things. An active and well-known blog can be parlayed into a writing career or even the eventual publication of a book.

If you’re a serious blogger, you can’t be lazy. You have to work hard at it, and it becomes a job. A fun job to be sure, but still a job. So I am going to give you some pointers for how to promote your blog and get as much visibility as possible. I’ve been blogging for almost a year now, and have learned enough about this along the way that I think my advice can help you too.

1. The most important thing is to write every day.
I’m serious. I’ve noticed that if I skip even ONE DAY without writing a new post, my viewership declines and I get fewer hits. Until you’re really well established or have a really famous blog (which most of us don’t), you cannot rest on the laurels of your last well-received and popular blog post. You must keep writing. Of course there will be days you can’t think of an original idea or are simply too tired to write anything original. In that case, it’s okay to post a photo, meme, cartoon, or reblog someone else’s article. If you do reblog an article though, try to write at least a paragraph or two introducing it and explaining why you’re reblogging it. Don’t reblog just for the sake of posting something. Make sure it’s something you really like or that resonates with you. Your readers will pick up your enthusiasm if you write an intro. But be careful not to do this to often. If you hardly ever post original material, people will lose interest in your blog because it becomes nothing more than a platform to promote the material of others.

2. Have a good looking blog.
WordPress has many themes and many of them are free. I think the majority of them are tasteful and easy on the eyes, and they are easy to set up. If you run ads on your blog (you won’t be doing this unless you’re a serious blogger anyway), be careful about having too many other graphics and widgets on your blog. I’m probably guilty of this, because my sidebar looks like a widget sardine can, but I can’t bring myself to delete any of them. But I don’t think this blog looks too “busy.” Don’t use background colors and patterns that are hard on the eyes or that clash with the content. Use a font that’s easy to read, not just because you think it looks “cool.”

3. No walls of text!
If you write long articles, it’s best to break them up into subheaders, “listicles” (numbered lists), or use graphics and pictures. Google Image is great for finding the perfect graphic for an article, or if you’re a good photographer, you can take your own pictures.

4. Reply to your comments.
This should be a no-brainer. If you allow comments but don’t answer them, people will think you’re a snob or that you don’t care. If you get many comments, it may not be practical to answer all of them, but at least “Like” them to let the commenter know you saw their comment. There is of course the option to not allow comments at all (which may be necessary if you are being stalked or bullied excessively) but if you want your blog to grow, I don’t recommend this. Blogging should be an interactive activity, and if you don’t allow comments, people will think you only care about your own opinion and will probably lose interest eventually. Also, don’t run people off by not allowing them to disagree with you. There’s a big difference between someone who merely disagrees with something you wrote and a bully. Disagreements can turn into interesting and lively debates and discussions.

5. Use the share buttons, even if you don’t use social media.
There are many social media share buttons that WordPress makes available. You should make all of these available under each article, so even if you don’t use social media yourself, other people will share your articles for you and that will help you gain visibility. It’s a fantastic feeling to look at your share buttons and see your counters growing. When one article of mine hit 1K shares on Facebook, I felt like I won the lottery.

6. Use Twitter and Facebook even if you hate them.
If you want your blog to grow, I recommend sharing articles on at least Twitter and Facebook, even if that’s the only reason you use these social media platforms. You can set your blog up so your articles are automatically shared to the social media platforms you choose without you having to actually go to the sites to do so.

7. Use Twitter #hashtags.
If you have a Twitter account, and you have an older article you want to promote, or one that seems to be especially popular, I recommend re-sharing it using #hashtags. The automatic share feature won’t do this for you, but if you manually share an article to Twitter, include a few #hashtags in your tweet (a box will pop up where you can do this). Hashtags are basically just one word tags that describe the content of your article. For example if you write about narcissism, and you are tweeting about a relevant article, use hashtags like #NPD, #narcissism, etc. You won’t be able to add too many so make sure they sum up the content and are popular words people search for. Doing this works because even if people aren’t following you on Twitter, if they look up a topic by using a certain #hashtag, your article will be listed and it will get a lot more views than if you do not use hashtags. It may sound #stupid, but it works for me every time.

8. Reference and link to other blogs and websites in your posts.
Not only does it appear you’ve done your research by quoting or referring to material from other blogs, every time you link to another blog or site, it creates a trackback, which appears on that blog, and from there people visiting the other blog can click on the trackback or pingback link and be taken to your blog post. It also helps foster goodwill between bloggers–most bloggers love to be credited and have their blog linked to, and they may recommend yours or link to yours in return. I can’t even tell you how many of my “referrers” are blogs I linked to months ago in a single blog post.

9. Make your content easy to find.
I’ve seen blogs you can’t navigate because there’s no option for finding what you’re looking for. That drives me crazy. No one wants to scroll through every article you ever wrote to find what they want to read (and how would they know it exists anyway if there’s no navigational tools?) At the very least, use a search bar (which you can add easily via the Widgets on the Admin page), but I recommend using a few other features too that make navigating your site easier, such as a tag cloud, a category list, a table of contents, or topics listed in the header or sidebar (mine are listed in the header and some include subtopics). If people can’t find what they’re looking for, they’ll throw their hands up in frustration and go to other blogs instead.

10. Make good use of tags and categories. I still have a lot to learn about this. I tend to use too many tags and categories, and I hear this is a no-no. I’m getting better though. Like Twitter #hashtags, using relevant words and phrases that describe your article’s content draws viewers, because when they’re searching for a topic in a search engine such as Google, tag words will make sure your article is listed there, even if it’s on page 20 to start with. As your blog grows, you will find your Google rankings rising and some articles may start appearing on the first page if they get enough views. There is no reason why you should have to pay for SEO. All you need is patience.

11. Make your blog mobile-friendly.
Just about everyone these days has a Smartphone with Internet access and many people even use it more often than their computer for reading web content. WordPress has a feature under Admin Tools for making your blog readable on mobile phones. Doing this will also increase your traffic because it makes it possible for people to read your blog even when they’re at work, walking the dog, eating dinner at the Olive Garden, or taking a bath.

12. Don’t let bullies and trolls intimidate you or destroy your will to blog. If you blog regularly, and especially if you start to get a lot of views and hits, be prepared for this. There are going to be people who won’t like you, your blog, or your content, or are jealous of you or just want to stir up trouble because that’s what trolls do. Be forewarned: it’s not a matter of if but when. Fortunately, other than nursing your hurt feelings (if you’re sensitive), dealing with these people shouldn’t pose too much of a problem. It’s pretty easy to control your haters on WordPress. You can’t block people the way you can on social media, but you can delete (or not approve) their comments. It’s your blog; you can write about whatever you wish, and if some people have a problem with what you have to say, they are basically telling you how to run your blog or even whether you have the right to blog, and neither of those things is okay. THEY are not your boss–YOU are. You can’t be fired from your job as a blogger–you can only quit. Write about what you want and put those nasty comments where they belong–in the Trash. Lick your wounds and keep on writing.

If you are being stalked or threatened (like a certain very popular WordPress blogger was recently), you can always set your blog to private or password-protected for awhile until the dust settles, or disable comments. With any luck, you won’t ever have to do either of those things.

11 guaranteed traffic boosters.

Winter Weather Georgia

In my 10 months of blogging, I’ve noticed certain topics generate more traffic than others. Of course I’m sure there are many I have not covered in this blog, but here are the ones I’ve written about that seem to always generate the most traffic. If I need a boost in views, I find writing about these things seems to do the trick every time.

1. Psychopathy/sociopathy — people love reading about bad people. I guess it satisfies the schadenfruede in all of us, or gives expression to our shadow side. Better yet, write about serial killers/mass murderers, or at least include a photo of one.

2. Malignant narcissism — see #1 (not quite as effective though)

3. Cats — it can even be a single picture of your own cat. Cats are like sex in the movies. They sell.

4. Furries — They’re both cool and strange. They are also polarizing (people either love ’em or hate ’em)

5. Desserts/recipes for desserts — we are all still sugar addicted little kids at heart.

6. Sex and romance — use the word “sex” in the title and watch your stats soar.

7. Pretty much anything about Aspergers — because Aspies abound on the Internet. Online, it’s cool to be a socially clueless introverted geek.

8. Anything controversial — You can have unpopular opinions, but be prepared to have haters if you express them. Between the haters and curiosity seekers, your stats will soar. If your blog is monetized, your haters increase your income. Try telling them that. 😉

9. Numbered lists — They’re called “listicles” and they will boost your traffic because people like easy to digest “soundbites” rather than walls of text. It’s one reason why Cracked.com is so popular (besides being an amazingly hilarious website).

10. Cuteness — anything that makes people go “awww” and feel like they have to punch a kitten to feel manly again is going to get you more hits. Cuteness is as addictive as crack. (see #3)

11. Humor — be careful with this one. Your joke has to be genuinely funny. If you’re not a funny person, skip this one.

10 things you discover about yourself when you have BPD.

borderlines_like

The linked article is so true it hurts. I’m experiencing a lot of this right now, in thinking about this disorder so much and the ways I have harmed and hurt people in my past and the little ways it still tries to sneak out.

I’m also reading James Masterson’s “The Search for the Real Self,” which I’ll review when I finish it. This book is like looking into a mirror at the way others have seen me all these years.

I feel like I’ve been given a new set of eyes and an entirely new perspective on myself.
I wonder how common it is for a BPD person to reach this point of self-awareness. I guess I must have been ready.

If you have BPD or know someone with BPD, please read this very important article.

10 Things You Discover About Yourself When You’re Diagnosed With Borderline Personality Disorder