All the dry, boring stuff about this blog–why I started it, how you can help, how you can stalk me, and how to act while you’re here.
It may not be what you came here to read, but read it anyway. 🙂
Lauren Bennett a/k/a “Lucky Otter”
So happy to find this blog! I just came out of a 1 1/2 long relationship and marriage with an MN….I have survived mostly due to my strong faith but still have had to deal with some of the after affects.
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I’m glad you stumbled on my blog–hope you find some help and hope here. Welcome.
Hey! I just found your site and I’m so relieved. I’ve got a Narcissistic/Borderline alcoholic ex husband who is truly a piece of work. He messed up my head pretty good with all his tricks. We’ve got two children together but they don’t see their daddy unless it’s under my supervision. Strangely, I’m just as intelligent and capable of manipulation as he is, and I’ve even given in to the urge to lie and manipulate at different times of my life, during high stress periods. It always fell flat because I couldn’t commit to it, my conscience bothered me too much. I didn’t have a great childhood, so I experienced Narcissistic/Borderline traits and work hard to self-examine and overcome them. I’d like to be a better person, so I work and work at it. Sometimes I still have abandonment fears(Borderline!) and ego flare ups(Narcissist!) but I’m not too hard on myself about it. I got a strong personality but there’s a vulnerable side to me too, I sure wish my parents had treated me better. I want my kids to have a better life than I did. So far they are happy, healthy, well loved, well fed, and well disciplined. I will protect them against their evil father with my very life. They want to see him because they love him unconditionally and I don’t want to take that from them. I’ve got full legal and physical custody, so I can pull the plug any old time, and he can cry in his beer and make me out to be the bad guy ALL HE WANTS. Not caring what this guy thinks, and refusing to interact with him, really pulls his teeth. If somebody believes him, then that person wasn’t really my friend to begin with. He will never be anything but my enemy…but like the principle of martial arts, I will act only defensively and use his energy against him. I’m so glad I’m NOT THE ONE WHO IS CRAZY. Thanks, man
Hi Jennifer, I am sorry you have such an evil ex. But I’m glad you’re not with him anymore and are trying to do what’s best for your kids. That’s the important thing and it sounds like you are taking the right steps to overcome your own N and B traits. I won’t judge you for that though–I have them too and am a diagnosed Borderline. Many people say it isn’t possible to be cured of Cluster B disorders, but I disagree! It’s not easy to heal but it is possible if the will to and awareness is there, and it sounds like you have both! I’m in therapy now and it helps and also writing as much as I can helps more than I ever imagined. I practice mindfulness (I took DBT) and most of the time I’m asymptomatic. Of course there are flare-ups and lately some things have triggered me. The tendency to act out may never completely disappear but it is in your control! Narcissistic abuse by others does this to us; I wholeheartedly believe that people who develop Cluster B disorders are victims too. That’s where I differ from a lot of other ACOn bloggers who demonize people with these disorders. That doesn’t mean I condone the things they do (not at all!) but I try to understand them because in so doing, I understand myself. Keep pushing along, and hope you keep reading!
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