“Now More Than Ever:” On Straitjacketing Trump

Posted on December 4, 2017 by luckyotter

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The phrase Now more than ever has been used liberally in our media since November last year, more often than not to sell something. The New York Times uses it to push subscriptions, for example, and it is not alone in this. Now more than ever did not matter, though, when the NYT had an opportunity to alert America to the clear and imminent dangers presented by the GOP candidate in 2016. The paper, like all others, disregarded repeated explicit warnings sent to it by mental health professionals who described Trump’s fixed, inflexible character defect with its predictable manifestations and consequences for the country and the world.

Another phrase one hears often these days is “future historians” — as in, future historians will be perplexed trying to figure out why America elected the least qualified and most dangerous person in the country for president.

There are solid reasons why this…

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Fake empathy.

Posted on September 5, 2017 by luckyotter

Most US Presidents, following a national disaster like Harvey, have spent time with survivors — comforting and talking to them, serving them food, and sharing hugs and even tears.

Donald Trump not only took several days to visit the people of Houston after Harvey left it devastated, when he arrived there, he spent more time bragging about the size of the crowds (as if he was at one of his rallies instead of at shelters where he had a captive audience) and what a “huge storm” Harvey had been. He talked more about how Texas could handle things because it was so strong than he did actually offering words of support and comfort to its people. Most outrageous of all, he told the survivors — people who had lost everything and were staying in crowded shelters — that they seemed “happy.”

Sure, he provided some good “optics” — picking up and kissing babies and pretending to serve food to the survivors — but his words to the people who were his captive audience were hollow, inappropriate to the occasion, and extremely awkward. He also didn’t miss an opportunity to diss the media and Hillary Clinton.

The mainstream media gave him a pass, fawning all over him for having at least tried to act presidential, when they should have been calling him out on his inappropriate, callous, and outrageous words of “support” to these devastated people.

This morning he decided to put an end to the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals program (DACA), an Obama-era program that ensured that young people who were brought over from other countries as children — a program that required its recipients to either be working or attending school. By ending DACA, he doomed these productive, intelligent young people to deportation back to the countries their parents brought them from (with a six month delay). That would mean that these kids and young adults, the vast majority of who are high achievers and are benefiting our economy, would lose everything. They would be stranded in foreign lands they couldn’t remember, in some cases knowing absolutely no one. For a party that calls itself “pro-family,” his heartless and cruel decision will tear families apart and destroy lives.

Trump also had a history of failing to acknowledge Americans who have died in tragic accidents, most recently the 12 sailors who died in an accident on a Coast Guard ship. Not one word was ever mentioned about those sailors, but this was far from the first incident in which Trump — unlike past presidents — just didn’t seem to care.

Watching Trump, I believe he not only has no empathy, he also has no conscience. That to me indicates a sociopathic, not merely narcissistic, personality. He actually seems to delight in causing pain and suffering. I do think he is in fact sadistic, and enjoys pushing policies that will traumatize and hurt people.

When he talked about Harvey, he seemed almost gleeful over how “big” and “powerful” the storm was. He seemed almost proud of it and acted like the Houston survivors should be proud of it too, as if it were some national monument or sports record. I think he could relate to the storm. He can relate to anything that’s powerful and destructive and destroys lives, because destruction and chaos is the only thing he understands.

Now he’s traumatizing the entire country by playing chicken with an equally unhinged narcissistic sociopath using nuclear weapons. Nuclear war is a real possibility. We are in grave danger of annihilation. But it’s just a game to these two — and we are pawns in their game. We are expendable because we aren’t people; we are merely objects to be played or discarded at whim. Trump’s ego is much more important than human life, and he is willing to kill us all to save his ego.

A friend told me her young daughter comes home everyday crying because she’s so afraid of nuclear war. She’s just 12, and can’t sleep. She can’t concentrate at school and is withdrawn and depressed. My friend told me she has had to send her daughter to a therapist to try to address this trauma. But this girl isn’t alone. Many people are being traumatized by this president’s actions and threats, but he will never care. Nor will he stop his destructive and dangerous behavior.

Going back to Harvey, Joel Osteen, the multimillionaire Prosperity Gospel preacher who holds his church services in a huge stadium, refused to open the stadium to flood survivors until he was finally shamed into it. He held a service to pray for the survivors– and passed around a collection plate for donations to the cause — even though the people at the service were the survivors themselves! Who does that?

Trump’s evangelical “spiritual advisers” offered only “thoughts and prayers” to the flood survivors– not any real tangible help such as money, food, clothing, or time spent comforting families. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with praying for people, but when “thoughts and prayers” are used as a substitution for any real help, they are as meaningless as a Hallmark card.

I’ve noticed this is something narcissists will do in lieu of offering any real help. They will condescendingly say, “I will pray for you,” or promise you they will send their “thoughts and prayers.” Another thing they will do is offer you phony and hollow platitudes, slogans, and sayings in place of actually offering you a listening ear, compassionate advice, or any real empathy. There’s a huge emotional disconnect — they can’t relate to you with any depth or as a person with real feelings. Instead, they try to mollify you with a few canned words printed on a card or a meme — and then put a guilt trip on you if you aren’t grateful for their lame and shallow efforts at “comfort.”

They also victim-shame. They airily tell you your life would be better if you just acted more happy, smiled more, or acted more positive. Now sure, there’s a place for positive thinking, and I agree that positive people tend to draw in more positive things in life (I have seen this work for myself). However, there is a limit to this. There are times such an attitude is just plain callous and insensitive, a way of dismissing the very real needs of people who have suffered misfortune through no fault of their own. Narcissists absolve themselves of any responsibility or having to offer any real help by insidiously blaming the victim by telling them “if only you were more happy/positive/smiled more, etc. ”

During his sermon for Harvey survivors, Osteen told the people — most who had just lost everything they owned — not to play the victim. I’m sorry, but how are people who have just lost everything they owned playing the victim? They are victims, and as such, they should be showered with real compassion, not condescending platitudes about positive thinking. They should also not be expected to donate to their own cause (especially when Osteen himself owns a 15 million dollar home and is one of the wealthiest men in the country) and most of these people had no access to cash or their bank accounts.

I think this conscienceless, heartless administration has been especially hard emotionally on people who have suffered abuse at the hands of people like them and also on people who are empaths and very sensitive to their spiritual darkness.

Narcissistic abuse in Trumpistan.

Posted on August 27, 2017 by luckyotter

Much has been written about Trump’s toxic psychology, specifically his malignant narcissism. In spite of The Goldwater Rule (an agreement between mental health professionals to never diagnose someone they have not evaluated), so egregious is 45’s bad behavior that thousands of mental health professionals are breaking their own rule and speculating that he does indeed suffer from both Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Psychopathy/Antisocial Personality Disorder (the non-clinical term is “malignant narcissism” when both disorders appear together).

But the problem isn’t limited to Trump. Our “president” (I’m sorry, but I refuse to refer to him as president without adding scare quotes for irony) has surrounded himself with a cabinet full of people as entitled-acting and seemingly lacking in human empathy and devoid of conscience as he is. If they are not sociopathic themselves, they are enabling cowards who keep making excuses for Trump’s horrible behavior and the toxic, abusive things he says. Some seem like programmed robots with no minds of their own, and others actually seem terrified to ever criticize or disobey him.

As for Trump’s pathologically loyal supporters, they really do seem unreachable. No amount of logic, facts, reason, or even appealing emotionally to their “better angels” seem to move them. Like Manson’s young followers who continued to defend Manson’s evil behavior and insane beliefs even to the point where they were willing to murder on his behalf, to his supporters, Trump really could “shoot someone on 5th Avenue” and they would not budge from his side. When presented with facts — even outright proof that their views are wrong — I’ve noticed a tendency for Trump supporters to double down on their pro-Trump beliefs (for example, if science has found that climate change is real, they will tell you that scientists are liars or are misinformed). Much more so than his opponents, Trump supporters seem to resort to personal attacks or angry outbursts, and, when that fails, they will cut you off from further discussion, even blocking you on social media so they don’t have to engage with you further or have their views challenged.

There’s two other situations in which you see this unholy trinity of egotistic authoritarian leader, sociopathic or sycophantic lackeys and enablers, and followers who seem to have no ability to think or act for themselves: in religious cults and in political dictatorships. Trumpism resembles a cult, and in fact it is one. Trump uses the same Machiavellian mind control tactics on his followers and those who carry out his bidding that cult leaders and dictators do.

I do believe we are being tested, and Trump is the logical conclusion of where we’ve been headed since at least the 1970s. His election signals that we have reached rock bottom and are being forced to be accountable — or self-destruct. If we are being tested, then it follows there is a solution, but it’s imperative that we do not allow ourselves to ever normalize what is happening or become so beaten down emotionally, mentally, and spiritually that we feel like there’s nothing we can do and succumb to the abuse — and yes, it is abuse.

The first step in fighting encroaching totalitarianism (let’s not mince words here because that’s exactly what this administration wants to install in place of democracy) is knowing the nature of the beast that threatens us, but to do that, we need to name it.

This is narcissistic abuse. It’s just as incapacitating, soul-destroying, creativity crushing, sickness-engendering, trauma-inducing, and crazy-making as the kind wrought on us by malignantly narcissistic parents, teachers, “friends,” relatives, lovers, and spouses.

But it’s a lot worse than that. It’s worse because it’s narcissistic abuse on a massive, nationwide, possibly worldwide scale. Unlike a toxic family or workplace or marriage, it’s a lot harder to go No Contact when the leader of your country is an abuser. In fact, going No Contact may not even be possible, should WWIII, enslavement, or internment in modern day concentration camps come to pass. This is not hyperbole or conspiracy theory: if things are allowed to continue the way they have been going since January, a high-tech feudalism, modern day replay of Nazi Germany, or even a Christian Taliban with Old Testament law replacing the Constitution will be our new reality.

Because what we are enduring is narcissistic abuse writ large, the same terminology and lingo used by narcissistic abuse survivors to refer to abusive parents, coworkers, lovers, friends, bosses and spouses certainly applies here as well.

So I’m going to present some of these narcissistic abuse terms, define them for those who aren’t familiar with what they mean, and use examples of how they are being used by this administration in their attempts to control us, beat us down, and eventually destroy us.

Gaslighting.

Gaslighting is probably the most well-known term used by narcissistic abuse survivors, and can now be seen in many articles about Trump as well. The term “gaslight” is taken from the 1942 psychological thriller of the same name, in which an abusive, sociopathic husband attempts to make his wife believe she is going insane by telling her she is imagining noises in the attic, the gaslights in the house going on and off by themselves, etc. when he is actually the one doing it without her knowledge. Gaslighting someone is an insidious and cruel mind control technique intended to make the other person question their own observations and beliefs, and even reality itself.

Trump gaslights us all every day through his demonization of the press (it’s all “fake news” and journalists are “enemies of the people”), liberals and Democrats, people who refuse to give him the worship he craves, and the truth itself, which he insists is a bunch of lies made up by the “lying media.” Hitler did the same thing, calling the media “lugenpresse,” which literally means “fake news.” He gaslights us by telling us that his abusive words and rhetoric are just “honesty” and that “political correctness” (avoiding abusive language and unfair policies) is the real evil that must be done away with. The intention is to wear those of us who value the truth down mentally and emotionally, while at the same time normalizing and encouraging those who pacify him and believe or deny his lies.

Divide and Conquer.

Divide and Conquer is a technique in which a cult leader or other sociopath in a powerful position deliberately sets people or groups against one another, the end result being that once a large group is fighting among themselves, they are easier to control or unleash abuse on without them really being aware of what is really happening.

Divide and Conquer can be seen in this administration, in which Trump encourages aggressive and violent behavior by the supporters who attend his rallies against reporters, people of color, and non-supporters who disagree with Trump or his policies.

Language is a powerful tool and Trump uses it to divide and conquer. Non-whites, Mexicans, Muslims, Democrats, and other groups Trump dislikes are dehumanized through language which normalizes aggression and violence against them. “Rough them up,” he says when speaking about reporters, and then later defends himself by saying he’s “joking” (which is a form of gaslighting). No other president has ever used language so destructively to deliberately encourage hatred and division, but it’s common among sociopaths and malignant narcissists like Trump. It foments hatred among his supporters against “the Other,” and they begin to normalize aggression and violence, even acting out on it or threatening civil war against Trump’s enemies, since Trump seems to think it’s okay. When a nation is divided in this manner, they are weakened and less unified, and thus easier to control and terrorize.

Projection.

Malignant narcissists have extremely fragile egos, and therefore cannot tolerate any criticism. Deep inside they are actually painfully aware of where they fall short, but this will never enter their consciousness. Should you ever call them out on their faults, be prepared for them to retaliate against you or target you for abuse. To defend against the knowledge of their own faults coming to awareness (thus destroying their image of themselves as perfect), they will project their worst traits onto others rather than admitting any fault in themselves. The fact that they have an uncanny way of blaming others for the very things they themselves do indicates that subconsciously, they know where they fall short.

Trump’s projection onto others is most obvious in his tweets, in which he regularly blames others for things he himself is doing, or accuses others of having character traits he himself possesses. Thus, it’s others who are weak, who are obstructionists, who lie, who are “very bad people,” who are disloyal, who are not nice, or are “bad hombres” — never him.

Flying Monkeys.

Flying monkeys is another term borrowed from the movies — in this case, “The Wizard of Oz.” When the Wicked Witch tried to keep Dorothy from getting to Oz by targeting her for torture and death, she enlisted the help of an army of flying monkeys to do her bidding. At the end, after Dorothy accidentally killed the Witch, we finally found out the flying monkeys were really the Witch’s slaves and were actually grateful to Dorothy for freeing them. In real life, flying monkeys may be lesser narcissists, or just normal but weak-willed people who are codependent to the abusive leader and become the leader’s enablers and cheerleaders. Sometimes they are not aware they are being used as flying monkeys, especially if the leader has convinced them that the targeted person or group is the real enemy and they are the ones being victimized (see DARVO, below).

Trump uses his cabinet members, his family members, and his supporters, including the people who attend his rallies, as flying monkeys to normalize and defend his hateful rhetoric and policies that will hurt the rest of us, including the flying monkeys themselves, who seem like they’re brainwashed. This was already discussed in the second paragraph of this post, so I won’t go into more detail here.

DARVO

DARVO is an acronym that stands for Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender. It’s common for narcissists to deny saying or doing something, but then attack YOU for accusing them, thus making themselves out to be the victim, and YOU as the one who is doing the abusing. It’s a form of both gaslighting and projection, with the added technique of feigning victimization to garner pity and support.

Trump is always playing the victim, complaining about how it’s always others who are obstructing him or lying about him, or who want to take him down. One of the most infamous examples to date is when he addressed a graduating class of the Coast Guard and proceeded to whine about how he was the most persecuted politician in the history of our nation. By making himself out to be the ultimate victim (and of course making everything about him and ruining these graduates’ special day), he also diminished the experiences of other politicians, war heroes, and former presidents who had suffered far worse.

Scapegoating.

This term is self-explanatory. It comes from the field of family dynamics. Malignant narcissists (and sometimes substance abusers such as alcoholics, who tend to have Cluster B disorders) almost always select a scapegoat to project the lion’s share of blame onto and thus the scapegoat becomes the designated carrier of toxic shame that the narcissist refuses to own. In a family headed by one or more narcissistic parents, one child may be selected to be the family scapegoat. That child is blamed for everything that goes wrong in the family, and is told repeatedly they are stupid, worthless, evil, ugly, crazy, or bad. They are punished more than the other children, even when they did nothing wrong. Their achievements are dismissed or even treated as something bad that must be punished. The scapegoat may also be bullied and abused by siblings, who act as the parent’s flying monkey(s). A scapegoated child tends to enter adulthood with depression, low self esteem, a pervading sense of danger, and other psychological problems that tend to reinforce their role as scapegoats even as they move beyond the family. Because scapegoats aren’t quick to defend themselves, are fearful and lack self esteem, predatory personalities seem to be able to smell them out and proceed to dish further abuse and rejection on them.

Scapegoats are usually the most physically or emotionally vulnerable, the most sensitive, or most thoughtful individuals in a toxic family or other group, and/or they are the whistle-blowers or the truth-tellers who refuse to become flying monkeys or enablers of the narcissist. Ironically, in a toxic family, they may be the most emotionally healthy individuals. Malignant narcissist parents or other leaders wish to silence anyone who tells the truth or blows the whistle — or who is a constant reminder to them of how dangerous and toxic they really are. Narcissists hate the “weak” and vulnerable, and they also hate those who tell the truth and expose them for what they are. They may also scapegoat those who disagree with them or criticize them.

Every week, it seems that Trump has a new scapegoat. While mainstream or liberal reporters and journalists (the truth tellers and whistle blowers) and groups of people who are not white, male and Christian seem to receive the lion’s share of his abuse and vilification, from week to week, Trump also targets a new individual — almost always someone who he perceives as being critical of him or obstructing his harebrained and wrongheaded policies. Obama is a constant target, since his very existence threatens his fragile ego (it’s obvious to me Trump hates Obama for having the temerity to be both more popular than he is and black), but he has also targeted Hillary Clinton, Chuck Schumer, and John McCain, as well as former and current insiders like Sean Spicer, Mitch McConnell, James Comey, and Jeff Sessions for abuse, which he usually metes out on Twitter.

Blame-Shifting.

Similar to projection and DARVO, blame-shifting is when a narcissist or sociopathic person refuses to accept or own blame and instead shifts responsibility onto someone else. Malignant narcissists will never ever admit wrongdoing or say they’re sorry, because to do so is admission that they are less than perfect and that is intolerable to them. The abusive husband who makes excuses for beating his wife (“she asked for it because of her nonstop nagging”) is shifting blame onto his wife instead of owning the fact that beating her was wrong.

Trump is constantly shifting blame to others. Not once during his entire 8 months in office has he ever apologized or said he’s sorry for anything. He’s made a lot of mistakes, some pretty terrible — but it’s always someone else’s fault. When his unpopular and unconstitutional policies fail to pass, it’s never his fault — it’s always the “Obstructionist Dems,” Mitch McConnell, the “FAKE NEWS” lying to the people, or whoever the villain of the day happens to be. He even makes excuses for the deplorable behavior of some of his white supremacist supporters, as he did when he said there was violence on both sides in Charlottesville — which there wasn’t. In so doing, he also sent a clear signal to his white supremacist and neo-Nazi supporters that Trump was okay with their particular form of terrorism (running a car into a crowd of counter-protesters, killing a young woman).

Splitting.

People with Cluster B disorders tend to think in terms of black-and-white, us-versus-them. There are NO shades of grey, NO mitigating circumstances, NO ambiguities. If a malignant narcissist has decided you are “bad,” there is NOTHING good about you. You might as well be Satan himself. If you have been labeled crazy, you are a word salad blabbering lunatic fit to be put in a straitjacket and locked up in the loony bin until the day you die. If you have been deemed an enemy, you can NEVER become a friend, nor do you have ANY redeeming qualities. Since you will inevitably disappoint the malignant narcissist, eventually he will turn harshly against you.

This is called splitting, and Trump does it all the time. Trump is incapable of seeing how complex people are, because he has zero insight into himself or any curiosity about human nature. If someone insults him, they couldn’t just be having a bad day, because Trump lacks the empathy to be able to put himself in someone else’s shoes. He would never consider that they might be right, either, because doing so would be intolerable to him. Insult Trump and you become the Enemy — fair game for dehumanization, vilification, and retaliatory abuse. There is no in between. If you are not loyal to him, you are Other — and Other is always very bad.

Devalue and Discard (D&D)

After a period of love-bombing (see below), in which you are the most perfect, wonderful, loyal friend or ally ever (because to the narcissist, you are either ALL good or ALL bad), you will inevitably (because you aren’t perfect) do or say something that hurts the narcissist’s feelings or causes him narcissistic injury. Once that has happened, they will turn on you like a pit viper and will proceed to make your life hell. In relationships, this may be the point at which the person who yesterday showered you with roses, candlelit dinners, and love letters now refuses to take your calls and blocks you on Facebook.

Trump has done this with many of his staff members, who were once confidantes and allies, and who he now attacks and vilifies because they failed to be “loyal” to him or were critical of him in some way. To Trump, other people are objects to be used or to provide narcissistic supply (worship and adulation), not imperfect human beings with both good and bad points.

Love-Bombing.

This is the initial phase of a relationship with a narcissist, in which you are the most perfect person in the world, but really you are just a mirror reflecting back to them what they want to see in themselves. Once that image is tarnished (because you found fault with the narcissist), the abuse and/or devaluation begins.

Trump employed love-bombing during his campaign, when he made all kinds of promises that “only he” could fix. He promised “healthcare for everybody” when his real agenda was to give a huge tax break to the wealthy while taking healthcare away from the most vulnerable, which included many of his own supporters. He promised lots of new manufacturing jobs, a border wall that “the Mexicans would pay for,” and all sorts of other things that he had no intention — or capability — of turning into reality. The only thing he’s kept his promise on is his neverending war on political correctness, but that’s turned into a war on anyone who dares criticize or question him.

Narcissistic Injury/Narcissistic Rage.

When you point out a narcissist’s faults or failures, he will enter a state of narcissistic injury — which means he is suffering a massive blow to his ego. Most people, when hurt, have a healthy enough sense of self that they will deal with the emotional blow honestly — by talking about it, admitting their feelings were hurt, making a joke about it, or just telling themselves it really doesn’t matter and trying to move on from it. But a malignant narcissist is incapable of making a joke or moving on or God forbid, admitting their own vulnerability. Because their sense of self is so fragile (and is really just an overlay for the emptiness within), the only way they can feel good about themselves again is to attack you and deflect blame. This is called narcissistic rage. Narcissistic rage can take many forms: gaslighting, outright verbal or physical abuse, threats, triangulation (secretly ganging up with others against the perpetrator), splitting, bullying, blame-shifting, deflecting, denial, the “silent treatment,” and D&D.

Trump displays many or even most of these behaviors whenever he perceives someone or some group has insulted him. You can see it in his face and body language when he’s enraged. His lips purse, his whole body goes stiff, and his eyes narrow and turn almost black with hatred and spite. He’s frightening to look at when he’s in the midst of narcissistic rage, which is often. I won’t list examples here because there are simply too many. Trump is paranoid and constantly battling real or imagined enemies. Eventually, everyone becomes an enemy to Trump.

False Self.

Narcissists have a very fragile sense of self and feel empty inside. To compensate, at an early age, they develop a “false self” — a kind of mask that shows others what they want you to believe they are. If this mask is threatened or attacked in any way, they risk their “real self” (the vulnerable and insecure child the mask hides) being exposed. This is why you cannot criticize a narcissist. Rather than listen to you and agree you may have a point, they will fight you to the death to maintain their image of perfection. Being seen as vulnerable or defenseless is simply too frightening to them. That’s one of the reasons they hate the vulnerable so much — people they perceive as “weak” fill them with shame of that which they need to hide.

A false self can take many forms, but for a classic or overt narcissist like Trump, it’s usually invulnerable and appears tough and self assured. If the mask isn’t challenged, this type of narcissist can appear to be very competent and confident. Some male narcissists, especially if they’re highly malignant like Trump, maintain a mask of toxic masculinity. Trump admires dictators and “strongmen” types like Vladimir Putin. He admires authoritarianism and political tactics that intimidate, terrorize, and oppress vulnerable populations. I don’t know the details of Trump’s early childhood, but I’ve heard his father was emotionally abusive and empathy and kindness were not qualities he valued in a male child. Only financial and material success were valued and rewarded. I wouldn’t doubt it if Trump’s desire to please such a difficult and unloving father is at the root of his narcissism and the “strongman” style of his false self.

Fear-Mongering.

Narcissists and sociopaths, in order to gain control over others, often resort to instilling fear and even terror in their subjects. Cult leaders, some religious leaders (especially fundamentalist leaders, whether Christian or Muslim), and dictators (as well as abusive husbands and mean bosses) are all known for this. They threaten and bully. They demand obedience and “loyalty” — or else. They believe their bullying behavior makes them seem strong and invincible, but anyone who needs to resort to threats and schoolyard bully tactics to get cooperation and support is pathetically weak in character and devoid of any real strength.

Trump bullies others and makes veiled threats against his opponents all the time on Twitter. He demands loyalty and calls people names. Many of his staff members seem intimidated by him and almost afraid to be honest or do the right thing. I sometimes wonder what he has threatened them with if they fail to cooperate.

Worst of all, Trump also tacitly encourages bullying behavior by his supporters against his opponents by failing to criticize their violent actions adequately or at all (Charlottesville), and by “jokingly” encouraging terrorist-type behavior and violence against his detractors at his rallies. But Trump is not joking. He is quite serious. Malignant narcissists are incapable of any real humor.

Obfuscation/deflection.

Another tactic malignant narcissists use to deflect blame or avoid responsibility is obfuscating — confusing the issue or creating chaos. Trump does this in a variety of ways, but all are intended to instigate chaos or create a new crisis that serves to obfuscate (hide) something he wants to deflect attention away from (such as the Russia investigation). Every day, some new drama comes out of this White House. Every day, he’s fighting with someone else, threatening someone, or someone else has quit or been fired. It’s like a reality show from hell.

All the constant drama is intended to create chaos and confusion, and keep both his opponents and supporters off balance. Leaders like this can be extremely dangerous because they are likely to incite something serious (like nuclear war with North Korea) in order to deflect negative attention away from themselves and their dishonest, unethical, or illegal activities. I don’t know about you, but I don’t care for the idea of being nuked because a petty and childish old man’s ego was wounded.

Another way narcissists obfuscate is through a special kind of “word salad” in which nothing they say makes any sense, although on the surface it may seem to. They leave you feeling confused and scratching your head, wondering what the hell they really meant by what they just said. Of course, if you question them or force them to make their message more clear, they will blame YOU — for being stupid or not understanding.

Truth or Dare?

Posted on August 22, 2017 by luckyotter

Elizabeth Mika writes probing, fascinating, and, well, creepy posts about Trump’s malignant narcissism and the ways our narcissism as a nation inevitably led to an election of someone like him. She also writes about the psychology of his most ardent followers, who seem eerily reminiscent of cult members. This is a phenomenon she accurately dubs “Trumpism.” When under the thrall of a cult leader, many people seem to forget their own morals and not have minds of their own. They will continue to deny truth and support their leader even when there is irrefutable proof of the leader’s immorality and even criminality held up to their noses.

In fact, I believe Trumpism is a cult, and Trump qualifies as a cult leader.

cult_definition In Ms. Mika’s most recent post, she writes about this disturbing trend and the true intentions of the criminal mob who hijacked the White House in November.

Truth or Dare?

Would you want to know ahead of time if your future president suffered from a dangerous, incurable character defect — not mental illness — that was typical for all tyrants in the history of human race?

What if that defect, with its predictable manifestations and consequences, was described to you early on, so you could perhaps help prevent the tyrant’s rise to power? Or, if too late for that, at least understood what to expect and pursue appropriate action as his reign took hold?

Would you want to know?

This knowledge is easily available, though for some reason we prefer not to find it, and that’s as our government, country, and the entire world come under threat from just such a characterologically defective leader and his circle of similarly impaired enablers.

Yet we don’t want to see it, and we loathe talking about it, even though, as Lee Siegal reminds us, avoiding questions about Trump’s mental unhealth is “a betrayal of the public trust, a denial of human nature, and an insult to posterity.”*

In a September 2016 post, The Red Herring of the Candidates’ (Physical) Health, I wrote:

If / when Trump is elected and proceeds to dismantle our democracy (yes, we know this is a very real possibility, thanks to correct diagnosis, as chaos and destruction are assured by his character defect; but he also said so, should there be any doubts), will we perhaps revisit and rethink the Goldwater Rule? If we have that chance, of course, and courage and a desire to do so.

The dismantling of our democracy is in full swing now and proceeds according to schedule.

Make no mistake: What we are witnessing is not some incompetent bumbling of political novices, but purposeful and vengeful destruction of our government, country, and possibly — if the pathocratic Trump/Bannon cabal is allowed to remain in power unopposed— the world.

*****

Read the rest of this post here.

I highly recommend Ms. Mika’s blog on Medium. This is where hers and other’s articles on Trump, Trumpism, and the normalization of sociopathy/narcissism in general can be found.

What the Old Testament has to say about not taking care of the poor.

Posted on June 21, 2017 by luckyotter

We Christians already know the Gospels are filled with writings about Jesus instructing his followers to take care of the “least among us” — the poor, sick and otherwise afflicted. We also know Jesus preferred the poor and less fortunate over the rich Pharisees of his day. There’s not much argument about how Jesus felt about the greedy and the selfish, which is why the Christian Right usually references the Old Testament with its harsher, angrier God. They can always find something there to use to make their greed, lack of compassion, and exploitation of the less fortunate for their own nefarious purposes (usually to enrich themselves) seem somehow moral, even God’s will. They’re good at cherry picking from the Old Testament to excuse their un-Christian views, and cherry pick they must, because there’s plenty in the Old Testament that condemns those who worship mammon and turn their backs on the less fortunate.

No matter what version of the Bible is used, the message conveyed is the same: we are to take care of and show compassion for the least among us, not exploit them and take away the little they have to enrich the already-wealthy. This is exactly what the christians in the current Republican Party (that is not a typo; I will not use a capital C to describe them because in my view they are not Christians) are trying to ram through the Senate in dark secrecy (which is in itself evil and dishonest). Their “healthcare bill” is a lie. It is nothing but yet another huge tax break for the richest 1% that will strip healthcare away from middle class and poor Americans, including the disabled and elderly (many who rely on Medicaid if they are in nursing homes or residential treatment since Medicare only pays a limited amount for long-term services); children, people with pre-existing conditions, older people like me who are still too young for Medicare (which, along with social security, might be gone by the time we hit age 65 or whatever the magic age is now) and families of limited means of any health insurance at all.

The huge irony here is this is the so-called pro-life party, but all they are is pro-birth. They care more about “the sanctity of the embryo” than about a sick child who needs medical care who they would gladly deny the right to see a doctor if her parents can’t afford it. If she dies, oh well, too bad, it was either “God’s will” or “her parents should have made better choices.” These sociopaths and their sycophants will continue to get their Cadillac health care plans though, paid for by our taxes, while many of us must sacrifice our own right to see a doctor if we become sick, or risk losing everything we own. Mike Pence once said that people who will lose their insurance “don’t need healthcare — they need more Jesus.” Well, Mr. Pence, since you’re apparently one of God’s chosen ones who seems to know exactly what the rest of us who are less blessed than you need, why don’t YOU give up YOUR Cadillac plan and rely on faith healing for yourself and your own family? If our only option after you rob us of healthcare is appealing to God for a cure and that’s supposed to be good enough for us, why isn’t it also good enough for you? Give up your healthcare plan so at least we’re all on a level playing field. No? I thought not. Of course, you don’t believe in fairness, because as one of God’s Elect, you deserve healthcare and I do not.

The hypocrisy and callousness of these swamp creatures is staggering.

Many innocent people will die if this abomination passes. I look at Mitch McConnell, the turtle-faced, dead-eyed, smirking, Koch Brothers-funded ringleader orchestrating the secret dealings to pass this cruel travesty that will help only the most wealthy and the corporations (people just like himself), a “man” who has the temerity to try to ram this bill through in dark secrecy without anyone knowing what’s in it except him and a few of his equally wealthy cronies — and he makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. He — perhaps more than anyone else in this administration (and they are all horrible human beings from everything I have seen of them) — reminds me of the Undead — some demonic swamp creature who seems to garner pleasure from the idea that millions of people will suffer and die. And he’s not the only one.

The spectacle of the smirks, backslaps, laughter, beer toasting, and glad-handing going on among McConnell, Paul Ryan, Mark Meadows, Trump, and so many other of these hate-filled white racist thugs at the Rose Garden party after “Trumpcare” passed the House back in May was a wake up call that sent chills through my soul. I realized with no uncertain terms that these creatures sold their souls for Mammon and walk on the side of darkness. If they profess to be Christian, it’s merely a talking point intended to gain support from the gullible red state religious types who blindly believe everything this cabal of Dark Triad power-mongers and their lying, gaslighting, fake news-generating pundits on Fox News, Breitbart, and InfoWars tell them. Their followers and supporters are in my prayers because to my mind, they are victims of a dangerous and powerful cult whose doctrine is anathema to anything Jesus taught.

Here are passages from the OLD TESTAMENT (I’ve included many versions of the Bible to illustrate it’s not just in the translation) that show that Jesus message in the Gospels is still God’s will for us. God is a constant and his love is for ALL of us, not just a chosen few.

preexisting

Proverbs 22:16

Verse (Click for Chapter)

New International Version
One who oppresses the poor to increase his wealth and one who gives gifts to the rich–both come to poverty.

New Living Translation
A person who gets ahead by oppressing the poor or by showering gifts on the rich will end in poverty.

English Standard Version
Whoever oppresses the poor to increase his own wealth, or gives to the rich, will only come to poverty.

New American Standard Bible
He who oppresses the poor to make more for himself Or who gives to the rich, will only come to poverty.

King James Bible
He that oppresseth the poor to increase his riches, and he that giveth to the rich, shall surely come to want.

Holman Christian Standard Bible
Oppressing the poor to enrich oneself, and giving to the rich–both lead only to poverty.

International Standard Version
Whoever oppresses the poor to enrich himself and whoever gives gifts to the wealthy will yield only loss.

NET Bible
The one who oppresses the poor to increase his own gain and the one who gives to the rich–both end up only in poverty.

New Heart English Bible
Whoever oppresses the poor for his own increase and whoever gives to the rich, both come to poverty.

Aramaic Bible in Plain English
He that harms the poor increases his own affliction and he that gives to the rich suffers loss to his soul.

GOD’S WORD® Translation
Oppressing the poor for profit [or] giving to the rich certainly leads to poverty.

JPS Tanakh 1917
One may oppress the poor, yet will their gain increase; One may give to the rich, yet will want come.

New American Standard 1977
He who oppresses the poor to make much for himself
Or who gives to the rich, will only come to poverty.

Jubilee Bible 2000
He that oppresses the poor to increase his riches and who gives to the rich shall surely come to want.

King James 2000 Bible
He that oppresses the poor to increase his riches, and he that gives to the rich, shall surely come to poverty.

American King James Version
He that oppresses the poor to increase his riches, and he that gives to the rich, shall surely come to want.

American Standard Version
He that oppresseth the poor to increase his gain , And he that giveth to the rich,’shall come only to want.

Douay-Rheims Bible
He that oppresseth the poor, to in- crease his own riches, shall himself give to one that is richer, and shall be in need.

Darby Bible Translation
He that oppresseth the poor, it is to enrich him; he that giveth to the rich, [bringeth] only to want.

English Revised Version
He that oppresseth the poor to increase his gain, and he that giveth to the rich, cometh only to want.

Webster’s Bible Translation
He that oppresseth the poor to increase his riches, and he that giveth to the rich, shall surely come to want.

World English Bible
Whoever oppresses the poor for his own increase and whoever gives to the rich, both come to poverty.

Young’s Literal Translation
He is oppressing the poor to multiply to him, He is giving to the rich — only to want.

Other Verses

James 2:13
For judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs over judgment.

Proverbs 22:22
Do not rob the poor because he is poor, Or crush the afflicted at the gate;

Proverbs 28:22
A man with an evil eye hastens after wealth And does not know that want will come upon him.

Ecclesiastes 5:8
If you see oppression of the poor and denial of justice and righteousness in the province, do not be shocked at the sight; for one official watches over another official, and there are higher officials over them.

On the oppressors:

Proverbs 22:22,23 Rob not the poor, because he is poor: neither oppress the afflicted …

Proverbs 14:31 He that oppresses the poor reproaches his Maker: but he that honors …

Proverbs 28:3 A poor man that oppresses the poor is like a sweeping rain which leaves no food.

Job 20:19 Because he has oppressed and has forsaken the poor; because he has …

Psalm 12:5 For the oppression of the poor, for the sighing of the needy, now …

Micah 2:2,3 And they covet fields, and take them by violence; and houses, and …

Zechariah 7:9-14 Thus speaks the LORD of hosts, saying, Execute true judgment, and …

James 2:13 For he shall have judgment without mercy, that has showed no mercy; …

James 5:1-5 Go to now, you rich men, weep and howl for your miseries that shall …

On those who give:

Luke 6:33-35 And if you do good to them which do good to you, what thank have …

Luke 14:12-14 Then said he also to him that bade him, When you make a dinner or …

Luke 16:24 And he cried and said, Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send …

Fake Christianity.

Posted on May 6, 2017 by luckyotter

I have a problem. I’m ashamed to admit I’m a Christian. That’s because these days, open-minded, compassionate, tolerant people with a conscience give you side-eye if you tell them you’re a Christian. They assume you embrace the far right values that many (if not most) churches today are teaching — values that embrace hatred, fear, paranoia, intolerance, xenophobia, homophobia, sexism, racism, authoritarianism, nationalism (as opposed to true patriotism) and — incredibly — greed (according to many Calvinist teachings, God rewards those who “live good lives” — the select He has already chosen — financially and materially). According to many fundamentalist and charismatic churches (especially of the Dominionist or prosperity-gospel type), if you’re poor or sick or aren’t “blessed” in this life, then you are not favored by God and will suffer eternal torment in Hell after living a life of hell. It’s unbelievable they can worship a God who is that cruel.

I’ve doubted for a long time that the far right “Christians” who run the nation are actually Christian at all, because their values seem to be in direct opposition to anything Jesus taught. They follow Ayn Rand’s teachings more closely than those of Christ. The reality is that it’s simply not possible to embrace Ayn Rand’s philosophy of selfishness and also be a Christian. They are diametrically opposed.

Last night my doubts turned to certainty, after I watched in horrified astonishment as the GOP held a party at the White House’s Rose Garden to celebrate their “victory” — a victory that, if it passes Senate — will destroy the lives or bankrupt tens of millions of average Americans and kill many, including innocent children and people with pre-existing conditions. I don’t have to go into everything that is wrong with this bill, because it would fill an entire page. That information is readily available elsewhere. But the spectacle of watching these rich white thugs drinking beer and partying after such a devastating bill passed the House, convinced me once and for all that these monsters are not only not Christian, they are absolutely, unapologetically evil. They may quote from the Bible and go to church and bloviate on about abortion and homosexuality, but they worship the god of Mammon. They have sold out the American people they are supposed to serve in exchange for even more tax breaks for themselves and those just like them. They are relentless in their cruelty and their greed is never satiated. No matter how wealthy they become, they want more and more and more. Last night I sat, horrified, watching these — beings (I hesitate to call them human) — toast each other and laugh about how they had stuck it to the rest of us who don’t have a prayer of ever having their kind of power and material wealth. They were celebrating the fact that they were placing real lives at risk. I turned off the TV, sickened and enraged and terrified by what I had seen.

No matter what they say, these are not good people or Christian people. They walk on the side of darkness and their hearts are black and empty. You can see it in their cold, dead eyes and their cruel, twisted smiles. They use Christianity as a way to cloak how dark their souls really are — and as a way to get even more power. Over a period of several decades starting in the 1970s, they have systematically co-opted Christianity as a means to win gullible and less-educated people (mostly in red states) over to their side. They have persuaded them their way is the only moral way, the only American way, the only Christian way. But it’s all lies. Using Christianity as a selling point is a brilliant tactic to gain even more money and power because it works like a charm. Using Christianity this way, these conscienceless criminals and power brokers have been able to hijack a nation and now have complete control of every branch of government. But still, it’s not enough. They want more, and more, and more.

Now their real work begins: dismantling everything good this nation ever stood for — discouraging and suppressing and ultimately destroying our freedoms and our opportunities and our rights and our safety nets. Their real goal is to create misery, chaos, despair, hopelessness, illness and suffering (both mental and physical — with no means to alleviate it), ignorance, poverty, strife, cruelty, slavery, and death. Lots and lots of death. It’s become increasingly obvious to me that their real agenda is to thin the herd. They used to try to hide this ugly reality, but they don’t even try very hard anymore. It’s all but out in the open for anyone who opens their eyes and ears. Their excuses for the horrible things they do are transparent to all but the most obtuse (or brainwashed) person. With every decision they have made, every executive order signed, every bill rammed through without ever asking once how the people feel about it, every lie they tell, they show their contempt for humanity, especially those who tell the truth or who are vulnerable and defenseless.

But it’s much more than just a show of contempt. They really are trying to kill off or silence the most vulnerable Americans — the poor (this includes the middle class and so their decimation will take a bit longer), the sick, the unwanted, the elderly, the disabled, the mentally ill (mental illness won’t be covered under this new bill but now the mentally ill can go out and buy guns — hmm, I wonder what message they are being sent?), immigrants, women, children, the unconventional, the artists, the dreamers, the truth-tellers, the whistle-blowers, and all the people who believe in justice and fairness and kindness and compassion and inclusion and opportunity and clean air and water and safe and healthy food. They want us all gone, and as soon as possible. Their “healthcare” bill is nothing less than slow mass genocide of those who aren’t useful to them. They have even said so much. If you protest against this mistreatment and yes, abuse — they scream about socialism and how the “liberal media” is destroying America. Again, lies. Under our new president, the lying and gaslighting has become so bad that lies are now facts, and facts are ‘fake news.’ Twisting the language and spinning lies into some kind of alternate reality is the way dictators gain their power — and it’s evil. There’s nothing remotely Christian about what they do.

I saw this comment today under an article about the the cruel GOP healthcare bill that explains the fake “Christianity” behind such a move:

God sent Joshua to kill every man, woman, and child to take the land of the Canaanites. The Bible is clear that sometimes God requires His people to commit genocide.

That’s the mentality we’re up against. No mention of how Jesus healed the sick (without demanding payment or refusing due to inability to pay), was friends with the downtrodden, loved the poor and the disabled and the old and the ill, and warned about greed and what happens to those who worship money and power. No, because all those things are “socialism” and to them, socialism is the greatest evil. To them, socialism is “theft” from those who “earned” their riches — often through no effort of their own.

It wasn’t always this way. There was once a time when Christianity leaned more to the left. This used to be called the “social gospel,” something you rarely hear about anymore, though very recently there’s been a resurgence of left wing Christianity among those who can see through the false Christianity that’s pushed down our throats by the far right. Peaceful Christian groups like the Quakers and Sojourners ministered to the poor, sick and others in need — expecting nothing in return. Mainstream Christian churches such as the Methodist or Episcopalian church held similar values. Sure, things like abortion, homosexuality, and sex outside marriage were frowned upon or even forbidden, but the overall message of Christianity was one of love, compassion, and caring for those less fortunate. Some Christians — and some (mostly mainstream) churches – still embrace this message, but the ones that were able to influence our current leaders are those that do not — and instead preach the prosperity gospel and a theology of exclusion (you’re going to hell if you are not “predestined” or chosen by God), fear (of hell and punishment on earth) and hatred (of anyone whose beliefs differ).

Starting in the late 1970s, a group called the Moral Majority began to change the political landscape, which until that time worked for the most part. They funneled money to the GOP and the GOP knew a good deal when they saw it. They realized they had to use Christianity to win over more supporters and soon, politicians were spouting Bible verses and talking about how schools should stop teaching evolution (or any science at all) and railing about abortion, and later, blaming those afflicted by poverty or disease for their “bad choices” or immoral behavior that led to their problems. They preached about America being a Christian nation — when it was becoming anything but. At the same time, the churches that had influenced the GOP were now telling their members that if they didn’t vote for so-and-so GOP politician, they were going to hell. I have no doubt that fear of eternal damnation being constantly drummed into their minds and hearts by their pastors had a lot to do with why so many religious red staters switched from Democrat to Republican, since most would never benefit from the policies they were voting for.

Make no mistake — although they may talk endlessly about their Christianity and be able to spout Bible verses, these compassionless rulers aren’t pro-life and they don’t care about family values. Railing on about how horrible abortion is, but denying healthcare to low and middle income pregnant women (by making pregnancy a pre-existing condition and putting pregnant women in a “high risk pool” where premiums will be astronomical) is going to make it financially impossible for many women to afford prenatal care. For many of these women, abortion (which is far less expensive than prenatal care and labor and delivery) may seem like their only choice, so the number of abortions will skyrocket. For those who courageously opt to have their child without the benefit of healthcare, they will run the risk of themselves or their babies dying in childbirth — it might as well be 1917, not 2017.

Their anti-life stance goes way beyond the abortion issue. Many of the newly uninsured will include families with children. Last week, Jimmy Kimmel gave an emotional speech about his newborn son who had a serious heart problem. In his moving plea, he talked about the fact that, while he is wealthy enough to have afforded healthcare for his son, even under the GOP plan, taking away healthcare from average and poor families will cause many children and babies who are sick to die. Any bill that will force a parent of average or low income to have to face their own child’s preventable death just because they can no longer afford healthcare is both cruel and evil.

Pro-life isn’t just about babies and children. Pro-life means preserving and enhancing lives no matter what your age or income. Forcing older people, the unemployed, the disabled, the poor, and the sick off healthcare is sentencing them to possible preventable illness, pain, and death. The powerful “Christians” in charge of things now think nothing about bombing other countries regardless of whether innocent civilians — including women and children — are killed or maimed. Free public education, organizations like the EPA that protect our air and water, arts and humanities programs, federal grant programs that help kids afford college, access to scientific information about our climate and environment, organizations that help families and children thrive, and numerous other organizations that preserve and promote quality of life are all being threatened. Their deliberate destruction is nothing short of abuse, as is the suppression of freedom of speech and truth in reporting. To be pro-life, you must care about all human life. To care only about the unborn and then callously offer no support or help to the already born — or rip away what support systems they have — isn’t pro-life, it’s pro-birth and anti-life. Unfortunately, many people who are less educated or lack critical thinking skills are one-issue voters, and always vote for the anti-abortion candidate no matter what their stance on other issues — even though the pro-choice candidate may actually be the more pro-life one when you step back and view the big picture.

We live in dark times, and whistleblowers and truth tellers are increasingly in danger because they threaten to expose the real agenda of the sociopaths and abusers who have hijacked our country and hold it hostage. Lying is their specialty. Why would they make an exception and tell the truth about Christianity? Look at their actions, not their words. These are fake Christians who only worship money and power. If it’s the Enemy who’s behind far right “Christianity,” then he’s giving it a very bad reputation, and that’s precisely his intention — and to create shame in the act of calling yourself a Christian, which is what I’m struggling with these days.

***

I want to share this article someone just shared with me. It was written by a therapist who has many patients traumatized by this president. She uses DBT principles to help them cope. I think people may find this article as helpful as I did.

How to Stay Sane if Trump is Driving You Insane.

The Current Political Situation (reblogged from Nyssa’s Hobbit Hole)

Posted on February 6, 2017 by luckyotter

crying_liberty

I’m sure my friend Nyssa from the Hobbit Hole won’t mind me reblogging this post she wrote today. I think politics is dominating many of our minds these days, especially for those of us who are survivors of abusive families or marriages and are triggered to the point of hypervigilance and paranoia by the constitutional chaos and hatred that seems to have suddenly taken over ever since Trump came into office. It’s as if the world has gone mad.

Every day since this president took office is more WTF than the last. Staying glued to the legitimate media (oh wait, I mean ‘fake news’) is almost an unconscious reflex that has its roots in our C-PTSD. But our morbid fascination and vigilance doesn’t have to be in vain. It can and should be a call to take action and (peacefully) protest and expose the truth, instead of listening to the shitstorm of hatred, lies (oops, I mean alternative facts), and national-level gaslighting and projection this Hitlerian president and his army of brainwashed ‘deplorables’ is engaging in, while they gleefully gut democracy in their attempts to turn us into a banana republic with a cruel and dictatorial ruler who wants to silence the free press, dismantle all regulations, build walls, shut down the EPA, and run our nation as if it’s a religious cult.

All I know is this: If I have to die under this new regime (and many probably will, either through acts of internal terrorism and violence, natural disasters due to unregulated plundering of our natural resources, disease caused by “mythical” global warming, or because they lost their health insurance, Medicare, Medicaid, or social security – those are all next on the table to be axed under this administration), I don’t want to die as a victim. I almost did already and I’m never going there again. I’d rather die fighting for truth and justice, whatever that might mean. I’m not going to succumb and die as one of the scared sheep who did nothing.

So, here is Nyssa’s article.

The Current Political Situation.

Nyssa’s Hobbit Hole

So much is going on that I can barely keep up. My friend Lucky Otter calls it hypervigilance, says that the abuse is now happening on a national scale…. We have the flying monkeys in large numbers….

I’m starting to burn out on news from the White House. It’s nonstop crapstorm every day. I spend hours just checking news feeds on Twitter. But I keep hearing that we should all be vigilant so we can protest through various channels and keep our voices heard. But I do have other things to do….

Then I watch movies of the White Rose Society, and hear how Germans didn’t do enough to stop the Nazis, for various reasons. We can keep the same thing from happening here, and it looks like we just might do so–but not if we stop watching. But what about the other things I need to do?

I’m following not just American newspapers, but German and British ones as well, to get more global perspectives. Der Spiegel is about to publish the English version of a scathing series on Trump. That’s the magazine which also put a controversial picture on the front cover, of Trump beheading the Statue of Liberty.

It’s all maddening. Those of us who have experienced narc abuse and other kinds of abuse, we can recognize what’s going on, but the flying monkeys call us “libtards” and laugh at us.

*****

Read the rest of Nyssa’s article here.

“This could never happen in America.”

Posted on January 28, 2017 by luckyotter

thingsthathappen

But it is.

I’m talking about the increasing feeling of unreality and foreboding under this new administration, run by a sociopath that even ten years ago wouldn’t have had a snowball’s chance in hell of becoming president.

I sat, frozen in horror on election night, as I watched more and more states turned red, even states that have traditionally been blue. I was upset, but I tried to talk myself down, almost convincing myself for a short time that maybe a Trump presidency wouldn’t be so bad.

But the days since his inauguration have been horrifying — and there have only been 7 of them. One week of a four year reign.

Every day seems worse than the last. As a nation, we seem to be on the fast track toward fascism, circling around a looming black hole with little to no chance of escape. Trump has been compared to Hitler. This is not hyperbole. The comparison is being made even by intellectually respected sources who don’t usually stoop to sensationalism and fearmongering (or Godwin’s Law) to make a point. If you doubt me, Google “Trump – Hitler.” The similarities in both the men themselves and the tactics they are using to rise to power are chilling.

I’ve tried to stay away from the news, but I can’t. I feel compelled to watch. I know what this compulsion is: it’s hypervigilance, a feeling I’m very familiar with. I no longer feel safe here in America. I feel like America no longer stands for what it once did, and its Constitution is being undermined a little more every day. I am terrified, and feel like I have to scan the horizon for danger all the time. But now I finally realize how someone like Hitler was able to rise to power. I always wondered how that could have happened. Now I know. Along with the horror and feelings of dissociation, is a feeling of helplessness. It’s incredibly triggering for someone already suffering from C-PTSD — only now it’s on a nationwide, maybe a worldwide, scale.

I can’t come home anymore and just relax. Nothing is normal anymore. I feel this NEED TO KNOW what Trump did or said. During the day, I feel the same undercurrent of fear and hypervigilance I felt being raised by, and then married to, abusers. And, like being married to an abuser, I never know what to expect. With each new day, Trump seems to be getting bolder. His outrageous comments, executive orders, lies, and hatred seem to know no bounds. I’m very afraid. I don’t think it’s exaggeration to admit that as a nation, America is in deep shit.

There seems very little that can be done. We’re careening toward civil war, the removal of any civil liberties or even the right to protest, blatant discrimination and profiling of immigrants from “targeted countries,” even the possibility of nuclear war. Information that has been freely available to the public is now being silenced, and facts are being denied. We have a president who truly believes climate change is a myth and ordered the removal of climate change information, smack dab in the middle of the warmest winter on record — beating even 2016, which until this year held that record.

We have a president who lies constantly, who uses Orwellian “newspeak” to his own and his supporters’ advantage, twisting language so that “lies” are now “alternative facts” and criticism and balanced reporting is “fake news.” There’s no need for me to list all the insane, hate filled, and untrue things Trump has said, and all the unbelievably heartless and stupid things he is attempting to do, or wants to do. He only seems to care about keeping his false self inflated, not at all about the American people or the country he’s systematically gutting from within as he claims to “make it great” again. He is normalizing racism, sexism, authoritarian rule, and even the use of torture on immigrants under the guise of “rejecting political correctness.”

The man’s obvious malignant narcissism makes it possible for him to obsess over the small size of the crowd at his inauguration and then lie about it, and actually have the gall to order an investigation (paid for by the taxpayers) as to why was he didn’t win the popular vote. Wah wah! I guess winning the presidency wasn’t enough. The man is an emotional ticking time bomb, and we should all be very concerned right now.

But I didn’t write this as a rant against Trump. I don’t hate him because he is a mentally ill person who should never have come within 1000 yards of the presidency. We allowed that to happen because of our complacency and apathy — and the way we have come to worship those who attained material wealth, no matter how they attained it. I’m writing this because I’m scared to death. I know I’m not alone. Every day I grow more afraid. For all its faults, I never felt unsafe in this country before. Like everyone else, I guess I took it for granted. There were certain things that just wouldn’t happen in America — but they are happening now. Blatant fascism is becoming the new normal. Things that would “never happen” are now more likely to happen than not.

Nothing can be predicted anymore. Anything could happen. There’s a new feeling of uncertainty and foreboding–and that awful helplessness–I never felt as an American. There’s also a surrealness, a sense of dissociation and unreality. It’s similar to the way I felt after 9/11, only this time it’s not an isolated event; it’s something that’s actually happening and will only grow worse if a miracle doesn’t happen, and soon. This time we aren’t being brought closer together; it’s a paradigm shift that will tear us even further apart. Divide and conquer, is, of course, part of a malignant narcissist’s agenda to gain even more control and power. If 9/11 caused Americans to suffer nationwide PTSD, a Trump presidency will cause a nationwide epidemic of C-PTSD.

We are so screwed.

Don’t give them what they want.

Posted on January 22, 2017 by luckyotter

courage_quote

Martha Crawford, LCSW, tweeted a series of thoughts about the Trump administration that tell us why we shouldn’t let it make us quake in terror. I know for me, her thoughts brought me some comfort. I know a lot of people are in mourning right now, and scared for their lives. We can mourn, we SHOULD mourn, but never be afraid!

This nation is a big dysfunctional family, and the vulnerable among us — the poor, the middle class, the disabled, those suffering with mental illness, the sick, the old, the very young, people of color, Muslims, Mexicans, women, gay people, and everyone else who doesn’t fit the “straight, white, rich Christian male” image — are the scapegoats of this administration and its sociopathic, very un-Christian leader. These scapegoats comprise almost all the “children” in this “family.” But we are far from alone. There are more of us than “them.” We can and should help each other, and never let our unloving, selfish “parents” make us feel afraid or helpless. That’s giving them what they want, and they feed off it to make themselves feel more powerful. Don’t give it to them.

Yes, the shit just got real. But the sun will shine again.

*****

So, listen. He has some power.
And it’s a temporal, worldly power established on a weak foundation — filled with cracks, outbursts, and hubris.
And all the myths and fairytales and scriptures tell us what happens to these kind of leaders.
And this is true across every culture — mythological texts teach us how to survive these dark “cursed” periods and how to undo them.
I’m not saying that his power is insignificant. It will destroy many, but it is fleeting because of its own unstable composition.
This administration will fly too close to the sun, will be brought down by a boy who names the truth, will sacrifice the wrong martyr.
It will transform all those who yearn to touch it into frozen statues of gold.
Its end was already written by the cruelty and avarice, the dominance and divisiveness that they wrote in the beginning of their story.
We can read those folk tales and retell those myths so we remember how to get through.
Befriend an old wise crone who seems to be a beggar, feed a magic animal, hold tight to the blessings of our mothers.
Be kind to the point of foolishness. Tell the truths that no one else acknowledges. Be quick, be clever, be resourceful.
The end of the cursed king’s story is written at its beginning. You need to use your heart and your wits to protect yourself and others.
When we all do that, it will help to bring along the fall that is inevitable. Utterly inevitable.
It’s not if. It’s how long.
And I only know it will come sooner if we aren’t afraid. Angry, sorrowful, grief stricken, joyful, generous, compassionate, and clever.
Fear and bewilderment are the ingredients they need to keep patching holes in their instability.
Feel every feeling. But find safe and quiet spaces for your fear and bewilderment. They feed off of that when they can smell it.
Be not afraid.
Do not become bewildered.
They will destroy others and ultimately themselves.
Don’t feed them your fear.
Don’t eat the fearful poison they want you to be contaminated by, because it will possess you and strengthen them.
That is our most central psychological task through the darkness — to come to terms with fear and to shake off bewilderment.
Withhold your fear from them. Do not listen to the spell that will bewilder and confound you if you are seduced by it.
Don’t eat anything they offer! Not a single pomegranite seed, not a box of Turkish Delight. Bring your provisions with you. Wait for grace.
Be kind to all potential comrades and allies. You never know of if a wounded bird is a powerful ally under enchantment.
We know what to do.
We have been here before. This is really not unprecedented. We have enacted this story over and over and over again.
It’s a story older than the Bible, older than the printing press. Older than our ability to remember these stories of survival and justice.
Whispered into our great great grandparents ears before they fell asleep at night.
We know what to do if we listen to the stories we have told ourselves for thousands upon thousands of years.

Still Cannot Believe It!

Posted on November 10, 2016 by luckyotter

I didn’t want to post yet another political article, but this post is too important not to share. I wish this was an exaggeration but I do not believe it is. The comparisons to Hitler are very real and I think we are in grave danger.

After our shock and sadness has passed, we have no choice but to mobilize and fight back. Violence isn’t necessary; the fight can be a peaceful one. Inevitably, people will die regardless. I’d rather die fighting the good fight than die helpless at the hands of a monster.

Numbers can overpower might and money. There are many more of us than there are the wealthy, powerful, and sociopathic. Rising up has worked before, and it can again.

Please leave comments under the original post.

Palestine WILL Be Free

Well the unthinkable has happened, at least for me and my ilk. We have a racist, sexist, xenophobic, homophobic, hate mongering man as president elect, who will be appearing in court for child rape charges, fraud charges and racketeering charges, and who refused to release his taxes, a 40 year old tradition. All this was well known, yet people still voted for him. That’s a story for another time. My point here is what happens now? Do Hispanics get thrown out? Will there really be a wall built? Climate change control is surely out the window. Obamacare will be defunded. Goodbye keeping your children on your insurance plan till age 26 and goodbye for not being denied due to preexisting condition.