Don’t give them what they want.

courage_quote

Martha Crawford, LCSW, tweeted a series of thoughts about the Trump administration that tell us why we shouldn’t let it make us quake in terror. I know for me, her thoughts brought me some comfort. I know a lot of people are in mourning right now, and scared for their lives. We can mourn, we SHOULD mourn, but never be afraid!

This nation is a big dysfunctional family, and the vulnerable among us — the poor, the middle class, the disabled, those suffering with mental illness, the sick, the old, the very young, people of color, Muslims, Mexicans, women, gay people, and everyone else who doesn’t fit the “straight, white, rich Christian male” image — are the scapegoats of this administration and its sociopathic, very un-Christian leader.     These scapegoats comprise almost all the “children” in this “family.”  But we are far from alone.  There are more of us than “them.”   We can and should help each other, and never let our unloving, selfish “parents” make us feel afraid or helpless.    That’s giving them what they want, and they feed off it to make themselves feel more powerful. Don’t give it to them.

Yes, the shit just got real.   But the sun will shine again.

 

*****

So, listen. He has some power.
And it’s a temporal, worldly power established on a weak foundation — filled with cracks, outbursts, and hubris.
And all the myths and fairytales and scriptures tell us what happens to these kind of leaders.
And this is true across every culture — mythological texts teach us how to survive these dark “cursed” periods and how to undo them.
I’m not saying that his power is insignificant. It will destroy many, but it is fleeting because of its own unstable composition.
This administration will fly too close to the sun, will be brought down by a boy who names the truth, will sacrifice the wrong martyr.
It will transform all those who yearn to touch it into frozen statues of gold.
Its end was already written by the cruelty and avarice, the dominance and divisiveness that they wrote in the beginning of their story.
We can read those folk tales and retell those myths so we remember how to get through.
Befriend an old wise crone who seems to be a beggar, feed a magic animal, hold tight to the blessings of our mothers.
Be kind to the point of foolishness. Tell the truths that no one else acknowledges. Be quick, be clever, be resourceful.
The end of the cursed king’s story is written at its beginning. You need to use your heart and your wits to protect yourself and others.
When we all do that, it will help to bring along the fall that is inevitable. Utterly inevitable.
It’s not if. It’s how long.
And I only know it will come sooner if we aren’t afraid. Angry, sorrowful, grief stricken, joyful, generous, compassionate, and clever.
Fear and bewilderment are the ingredients they need to keep patching holes in their instability.
Feel every feeling. But find safe and quiet spaces for your fear and bewilderment. They feed off of that when they can smell it.
Be not afraid.
Do not become bewildered.
They will destroy others and ultimately themselves.
Don’t feed them your fear.
Don’t eat the fearful poison they want you to be contaminated by, because it will possess you and strengthen them.
That is our most central psychological task through the darkness — to come to terms with fear and to shake off bewilderment.
Withhold your fear from them. Do not listen to the spell that will bewilder and confound you if you are seduced by it.
Don’t eat anything they offer! Not a single pomegranite seed, not a box of Turkish Delight. Bring your provisions with you. Wait for grace.
Be kind to all potential comrades and allies. You never know of if a wounded bird is a powerful ally under enchantment.
We know what to do.
We have been here before. This is really not unprecedented. We have enacted this story over and over and over again.
It’s a story older than the Bible, older than the printing press. Older than our ability to remember these stories of survival and justice.
Whispered into our great great grandparents ears before they fell asleep at night.
We know what to do if we listen to the stories we have told ourselves for thousands upon thousands of years.

Mourning.

I feel like I’m in mourning today.     I could barely get through my day.  I called my therapist and told him how upset I was and asked him if  crying and feeling this depressed over a presidential election was a normal reaction.    He shared with me that his phone had been ringing off the hook since last night because people are so depressed, despondent, hopeless, suicidal–and yes, many are crying too.    There are many, many of us feeling a great loss today.   Not over Hillary’s loss per se, but over the loss of hope for this nation.

It’s all over.  America, as we knew it, is no more.

But it’s been coming to this point for 40 years.  How could we have been so blind and denied what was obvious?

It’s all so surreal.

And the games haven’t even begun yet.   We are in deep shit.

This is the worst thing that could ever have happened to this country.   I can’t see anything good coming from it.

I see a Hunger Games future for this country.

I can relate to this song right now, so much.   It was recorded in 1965, a time of hope and innocence when the country was changing in a positive way and people were waking up to new possibilities.  Now everything’s all going to roll back to 50, 100 years ago–a time when women knew their place was in the home serving their authoritarian husbands,  there were no social support systems for the vulnerable, children were to be seen and not heard, homosexuality was considered a serious mental illness, and non-whites knew their place was in a servile role to the rich white men who ran things.

But people still flocked to America even then because they saw the possibilities, the promise of freedom and opportunity.

All of that is gone.

RIP AMERICA: 1776 – 2016

 

Further reading:

The Five Stages of Trump Grief: How to Go Through Them as Fast as Possible (from Mashable.com)