Meet and Greet: 5/6/17

Dream Big, Dream Often

 dreambigwallpaper-pinkombre

It’s the Meet and Greet weekend everyone!!  Strap on your party shoes and join the fun!  

Ok so here are the rules:

  1. Leave a link to your page or post in the comments of this post.
  2. Reblog this post.  It helps you, it helps me, it helps everyone!
  3. Edit your reblog post and add tags.
  4. Feel free to leave your link multiple times!  It is okay to update your link for more exposure every day if you want.  It is up to you!

  5. Share this post on social media.  Many of my non-blogger friends love that I put the Meet n Greet on Facebook and Twitter because they find new blogs to follow.

See ya on Monday!!

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Fake Christianity.

I have a problem.  I’m ashamed to admit I’m a Christian.    That’s because these days, open-minded, compassionate, tolerant people with a conscience give you side-eye if you tell them you’re a Christian.   They assume you embrace the far right values that many (if not most) churches today are teaching — values that embrace hatred, fear, paranoia, intolerance, xenophobia, homophobia, sexism, racism, authoritarianism, nationalism (as opposed to true patriotism) and — incredibly — greed (according to many Calvinist teachings, God rewards those who “live good lives” — the select He has already chosen — financially and materially).   According to many fundamentalist and charismatic churches (especially of the Dominionist or prosperity-gospel type), if you’re poor or sick or aren’t “blessed” in this life, then you are not favored by God and will suffer eternal torment in Hell after living a life of hell.     It’s unbelievable they can worship a God who is that cruel.

I’ve doubted for a long time that the far right “Christians” who run the nation are actually Christian at all, because their values seem to be in direct opposition to anything Jesus taught.    They follow Ayn Rand’s teachings more closely than those of Christ.  The reality is that it’s simply not possible to embrace Ayn Rand’s philosophy of selfishness and also be a Christian.  They are diametrically opposed.

Last night my doubts turned to certainty, after I watched in horrified astonishment as the GOP held a party at the  White House’s Rose Garden to celebrate their “victory” — a victory that, if it passes Senate — will destroy the lives or bankrupt tens of millions of average Americans and kill many, including innocent children and people with pre-existing conditions.    I don’t have to go into everything that is wrong with this bill, because it would fill an entire page.  That information is readily available elsewhere.   But the spectacle of watching these rich white thugs drinking beer and partying after such a devastating bill passed the House, convinced me once and for all that these monsters are not only not Christian, they are absolutely, unapologetically evil.     They may quote from the Bible and go to church and bloviate on about abortion and homosexuality, but they worship the god of Mammon.   They have sold out the American people they are supposed to serve in exchange for even more tax breaks for themselves and those just like them.  They are relentless in their cruelty and their greed is never satiated.  No matter how wealthy they become, they want more and more and more.   Last night I sat, horrified, watching these — beings (I hesitate to call them human) — toast each other and laugh about how they had stuck it to the rest of us who don’t have a prayer of ever having their kind of power and material wealth.    They were celebrating the fact that they were placing real lives at risk.  I turned off the TV, sickened and enraged and terrified by what I had seen.

No matter what they say, these are not good people or Christian people.  They walk on the side of darkness and their hearts are black and empty.   You can see it in their cold, dead eyes and their cruel, twisted smiles.    They use Christianity as a way to cloak how dark their souls really are — and as a way to get even more power.  Over a period of several decades starting in the 1970s, they have systematically co-opted Christianity as a means to win gullible and less-educated people (mostly in red states) over to their side.  They have persuaded them their way is the only moral way, the only American way, the only Christian way.  But it’s all lies.  Using Christianity as a selling point is a brilliant tactic to gain even more money and power because it works like a charm.   Using Christianity this way, these conscienceless criminals and power brokers have been able to hijack a nation and now have complete control of every branch of government.   But still, it’s not enough.  They want more, and more, and more.

Now their real work begins:  dismantling everything good this nation ever stood for — discouraging and suppressing and ultimately destroying our freedoms and our  opportunities and our rights and our safety nets.    Their real goal is to create misery, chaos, despair, hopelessness, illness and suffering (both mental and physical — with no means to alleviate it), ignorance, poverty, strife, cruelty, slavery, and death.  Lots and lots of death.   It’s become increasingly obvious to me that their real agenda is to thin the herd.   They used to try to hide this ugly reality, but they don’t even try very hard anymore.   It’s all but out in the open for anyone who opens their eyes and ears.   Their excuses for the horrible things they do are transparent to all but the most obtuse (or brainwashed) person.  With every decision they have made, every executive order signed, every bill rammed through without ever asking once how the people feel about it, every lie they tell, they show their contempt for humanity, especially those who tell the truth or who are vulnerable and defenseless.

But it’s much more than just a show of contempt. They really are trying to kill off or silence the most vulnerable Americans — the poor (this includes the middle class and so their decimation will take a bit longer), the sick, the unwanted, the elderly, the disabled, the mentally ill (mental illness won’t be covered under this new bill but now the mentally ill can go out and buy guns — hmm, I wonder what message they are being sent?), immigrants, women, children, the unconventional, the artists, the dreamers, the truth-tellers, the whistle-blowers, and all the people who believe in justice and fairness and kindness and compassion and inclusion and opportunity and clean air and water and safe and healthy food.   They want us all gone, and as soon as possible.  Their “healthcare” bill is nothing less than slow mass genocide of those who aren’t useful to them.   They have even said so much.  If you protest against this mistreatment and yes, abuse — they scream about socialism and how the “liberal media” is destroying America.  Again, lies.   Under our new president, the lying and gaslighting has become so bad that lies are now facts, and facts are ‘fake news.’   Twisting the language and spinning lies into some kind of alternate reality is the way dictators gain their power — and it’s evil.  There’s nothing remotely Christian about what they do.

I saw this comment today under an article about the the cruel GOP healthcare bill that explains the fake “Christianity” behind such a move:

God sent Joshua to kill every man, woman, and child to take the land of the Canaanites.  The Bible is clear that sometimes God requires His people to commit genocide.

 

That’s the mentality we’re up against.  No mention of how Jesus healed the sick (without demanding payment or refusing due to inability to pay),  was friends with the downtrodden,  loved the poor and the disabled and the old and the ill, and warned about greed and what happens to those who worship money and power.    No, because all those things are “socialism” and to them, socialism is the greatest evil.     To them, socialism is “theft” from those who “earned” their riches — often through no effort of their own.

It wasn’t always this way.   There was once a time when Christianity leaned more to the left.   This used to be called the “social gospel,” something you rarely hear about anymore, though very recently there’s been a resurgence of left wing Christianity among those who can see through the false Christianity that’s pushed down our throats by the far right.  Peaceful Christian groups like the Quakers and Sojourners ministered to the poor, sick and others  in need — expecting nothing in return.  Mainstream Christian churches such as the Methodist or Episcopalian church held similar values.  Sure, things like abortion, homosexuality, and sex outside marriage were frowned upon or even forbidden, but the overall message of Christianity was one of love, compassion, and caring for those less fortunate.  Some Christians — and some (mostly mainstream) churches – still embrace this message, but the ones that were able to influence our current leaders are those that do not — and instead preach the prosperity gospel and a theology of exclusion (you’re going to hell if you are not “predestined” or chosen by God), fear (of hell and punishment on earth) and hatred (of anyone whose beliefs differ).

Starting in the late 1970s, a group called the Moral Majority began to change the political landscape, which until that time worked for the most part.   They funneled money to the GOP and the GOP knew a good deal when they saw it.  They realized they had to use Christianity to win over more supporters and soon, politicians were spouting Bible verses and talking about how schools should stop teaching evolution (or any science at all) and railing about abortion, and later, blaming those afflicted by poverty or disease for their “bad choices” or immoral behavior that led to their problems.   They preached about America being a Christian nation — when it was becoming anything but.     At the same time, the churches that had influenced the GOP were now telling their members that if they didn’t vote for so-and-so GOP politician, they were going to hell.    I have no doubt that fear of eternal damnation being constantly drummed into their minds and hearts by their pastors had a lot to do with why so many religious red staters switched from Democrat to Republican, since most would never benefit from the policies they were voting for.

Make no mistake — although they may talk endlessly about their Christianity and be able to spout Bible verses, these compassionless rulers aren’t pro-life and they don’t care about family values.    Railing on about how horrible abortion is, but denying healthcare to low and middle income pregnant women (by making pregnancy a pre-existing condition and putting pregnant women in a “high risk pool” where premiums will be astronomical) is going to make it financially impossible for many women to afford prenatal care.   For many of these women, abortion (which is far less expensive than prenatal care and labor and delivery) may seem like their only choice, so the number of abortions will skyrocket.   For those who courageously opt to have their child without the benefit of healthcare,  they will run the risk of themselves or their babies dying in childbirth — it might as well be 1917, not 2017.

Their anti-life stance goes way beyond the abortion issue.   Many of the newly uninsured will include families with children.     Last week, Jimmy Kimmel gave an emotional speech about his newborn son who had a serious heart problem.   In his moving plea, he talked about the fact that, while he is wealthy enough to have afforded healthcare for his son, even under the GOP plan, taking away healthcare from average and poor families will cause many children and babies who are sick to die.   Any bill that will force a parent of average or low income to have to face their own child’s preventable death just because they can no longer afford healthcare is both cruel and evil.

Pro-life isn’t just about babies and children.   Pro-life means preserving and enhancing lives no matter what your age or income.   Forcing older people, the unemployed, the disabled, the poor, and the sick off healthcare is sentencing them to possible preventable illness, pain, and death.   The powerful “Christians” in charge of things now think nothing about bombing other countries regardless of whether innocent civilians — including women and children — are killed or maimed.  Free public education, organizations like the EPA that protect our air and water, arts and humanities programs, federal grant programs that help kids afford college, access to scientific information about our climate and environment, organizations that help families and children thrive, and numerous other organizations that preserve and promote quality of life are all being threatened.   Their deliberate destruction is nothing short of abuse, as is the suppression of freedom of speech and truth in reporting.    To be pro-life, you must care about all human life.  To care only about the unborn and then callously offer no support or help to the already born — or rip away what support systems they have — isn’t pro-life, it’s pro-birth and anti-life.    Unfortunately, many people who are less educated or lack critical thinking skills are one-issue voters, and always vote for the anti-abortion candidate no matter what their stance on other issues — even though the pro-choice candidate may actually be the more pro-life one when you step back and view the big picture.

We live in dark times, and whistleblowers and truth tellers are increasingly in danger because they threaten to expose the real agenda of the sociopaths and abusers who have hijacked our country and hold it hostage.    Lying is their specialty.  Why would they make an exception and tell the truth about Christianity?   Look at their actions, not their words. These are fake Christians who only worship money and power.  If it’s the Enemy who’s behind far right “Christianity,” then he’s giving it a very bad reputation, and that’s precisely his intention — and to create shame in the act of calling yourself a Christian, which is what I’m struggling with these days.

***

I want to share this article someone just shared with me.   It was written by a therapist who has many patients traumatized by this president. She uses DBT principles to help them cope.   I think people may find this article as helpful as I did.

How to Stay Sane if Trump is Driving You Insane.

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I hate Paul Ryan.

paulryan_jerk

PLEASE SHARE AND DO THIS!  If you are serious about saving the ACA, text RESIST to 50409. You can do this more than once. Each time, a letter will be sent to another two senators or representatives. This is real — and you will get an actual person who will work with you on your letter.

*****

I’m breaking my own rule here not to write a rant about partisan politics, but this really isn’t a partisan issue, or if it is, it shouldn’t be.

“Trumpcare” might win the house, and he is willing to bet our lives against the house.  This is unbelievable. If this bill passes, I better pray I don’t get sick, which isn’t likely given my age. I’m in that vulnerable ‘older’ (50-64) age group and am FAR from rich. No way could I afford the premiums.  I’ll be in that group of 14 million who loses their healthcare the first year.

If you have a ‘pre-existing condition’ you will not even be able to get insurance even if you could afford it, if your state opts out, which many red states will.  These people say they are pro-life, but guess what — PREGNANCY is a pre-existing condition!   You can be sure there will be more abortions then ever, when poor and middle class women who lose their healthcare realize their pregnancies won’t even be covered.

Ironically, Trump’s working class supporters will be most negatively affected by this horrible bill. It probably won’t pass Senate, but still, this is so scary.

paulryan_asshole

I also want to smack that smug, self righteous smirk off Ryan’s stupid face.   I don’t hate too many people (even Trump escapes my hatred a little because he’s batshit insane and a mental and emotional child), but I really, REALLY hate Paul Ryan.  This smug sociopath (who lived off the death benefits from his dad’s social security and had everything paid for by the government (and still gets everything paid for by the government through OUR TAXES) thinks people need to “take responsibility” for their own healthcare.  HELLO?!   How is losing your health insurance going to teach ANYONE responsibility?  I’m so SICK of this blaming the victim, Ayn Randian, “bootstraps” mentality.

This Eddie Munster-looking twit has NO conscience and not a shred of empathy.    I can just see the way he’ll gloat and smirk if and when this “healthcare” bill passes.  He just loves the idea of kicking 24 million people off healthcare.  He WANTS us to suffer and die.   I really think this Ayn Rand worshipping d*ck is trying to thin the herd — the old, poor and sick  aren’t “producers” so of course they can go first.   Good thing we have liberal GUN LAWS — because if you get cancer, suicide might be the only option.     This bill also means a big ass tax break for his billionaire buddies.   God, I hate this administration.  NOTHING they have done or plan to do is good for the average American.    These people are CHRISTIANS?  That’s a laugh.   Pro-life?  Yeah, only until you’re born.  Have a sick baby and you’re not rich? Too bad!  You should have made better life choices.

Sorry if this offends, but I’m mad as hell and scared!  It’s very traumatizing for many of us.   I hope the whole lot of them get impeached soon.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/republicans-health-care-bill_us_5909fdf9e4b02655f84314af?ncid=inblnkushpmg00000009

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Tornado magnet.

Stay safe, everyone living in the line of the tornadoes and severe storms that are barrelling though the country right now.

tornadomagnet

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God among us.

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God is everywhere, but sometimes it seems like he’s nowhere in the universe when we’re depressed or in emotional or physical pain.

You don’t have to go to church or read the Bible to find God.    God doesn’t live on a lofty cloud always passing harsh judgment on us underlings far below on this little planet.    He isn’t a being we can only know after we die, or only in religious settings.  He can’t always be found in that hellfire and brimstone preacher in the megachurch on the outskirts of town, and He certainly isn’t present in those television evangelists who prey on the poor and gullible by insisting you make a large donation to their organization in exchange for salvation.

In 1977, there was a little movie called “Oh, God” starring John Denver as an assistant grocery store manager, who was searching for meaning in his life.  God (played by George Burns) appeared to Denver as a kindly but slightly eccentric little old man who was one of his customers.   At first, Denver was unbelieving, but over time it became clear this old guy was the real deal, and his life began to change.

Twenty years later, there was a popular song by a singer-songwriter named Joan Osborne called “One of Us.”  The lyrics speculated about the nature of God, and whether He (or she) would appear as “one of us” —

If God had a name, what would it be?
And would you call it to His face?
If you were faced with Him in all His glory
What would you ask if you had just one question?

And yeah, yeah God is great
Yeah, yeah, God is good
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make His way home?

If God had a face, what would it look like?
And would you want to see?
If seeing meant that you would have to believe
In things like heaven and in Jesus and the saints and all the prophets?

And yeah, yeah God is great
Yeah, yeah, God is good
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make His way home?

He’s trying to make His way home
Back up to Heaven all alone
Nobody calling on the phone
Except for the pope maybe in Rome

And yeah, yeah God is great
Yeah, yeah, God is good
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make His way home?

Just trying to make His way home
Like a holy rolling stone
Back up to Heaven all alone
Just trying to make His way home
Nobody calling on the phone
Except for the pope maybe in Rome

Joan Osborne – What If God Was One Of Us Lyrics | MetroLyrics

The song in its time was somewhat controversial, because it had the temerity to suggest that God might be just a little too much like us — eg, too human (and therefore, not perfect).

While I don’t believe God would take up permanent residence in a human body, as He does in Osborne’s random stranger on a bus or as Burns’ unremarkable old man buying groceries,  I do believe God (or Jesus, if you are Christian) can use each and any of us as a vessel (for a short time) to touch the lives of others, and sometimes even change them.    We are all made in God’s image, and sometimes, when we least expect it, after feeling disconnected and ready to give up on spiritual life, God is suddenly right there, speaking to us, encouraging us,  or offering comfort — through another human being, often a total stranger.  That other person doesn’t even have to be Christian or believe in God, because I know from my own experience that sometimes God can even use a nonbeliever as a vessel to spread his love and care.

Here are some examples from my own life of times I knew God was there, using another person to communicate with me or perform those “random acts of kindness” that seem so rare in today’s complex world:

  • When I was buying groceries a few days before Christmas a few years ago and my debit card was run through and showed I had insufficient funds, a man behind me suddenly handed the cashier the $40 I was short of.
  • A customer of mine who recently bought me four new tires because he didn’t want me driving on the old ones (the man happens to be an atheist)
  • Every time my therapist  is able to feel my feelings with me and due to that high empathy (which is a gift bestowed on him by God, even though he is a non-Christian), know exactly what I need from him emotionally.
  • A hug from a random little girl of about 4 who told me, “don’t be sad.”   I wasn’t crying, but was going through a dark time in my life and was being abused at home.  Somehow she knew how much I needed that hug.
  • A man with Down Syndrome standing in line at the store who was pointing to things, smiling and laughing at everything he saw.   His eyes sparkled and he just seemed so excited to be alive.  People around him were laughing too, but not at him.  They laughed with him, because he was so happy and made everyone just feel so good (as an aside, it’s interesting how often God appears through people standing on line at the store).
  • Random thoughtful gifts or kind words from my children when I didn’t expect it and other people I never expected a gift or a kind word from.
  • A woman I met online and wrote about last November who offered to pay for me to attend a 4 day seminar addressing trauma from a spiritual/Christian perspective, after I told her I didn’t have the funds and couldn’t go.
  • Another woman I met online and became friends with, who sent two thoughtful gifts to me exactly when I needed them, without my asking.

littlegirlwithflowers

There are so many other examples, but these are the first ones I thought of.

Think about the times that God has reached you through another person — who either gave unselfishly of themselves, or just made you feel comforted or happy during a dark time or when you least expected it.    Make a list of those times and refer to it when you feel like God has forgotten about you.

Think about how you can touch the lives of others.  Ask God to show you how He can work through you to help others in need.

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New summer project: an enclosed porch.

porch

This is what my porch looks like now.

When I was in Florida earlier this month, I was impressed by some of the screened in porches I saw around my son’s apartment complex, some festooned with white or colored year-round Christmas-type lights, lots of plants, and decked out with comfy indoor/outdoor furniture.    I mentioned to my daughter and her BF Zach how inviting they looked and how I wished my porch was enclosed like that.

Well, as it happens,  Zach knows a bit about building and construction, and said he and my daughter would be willing to pay for half of the cost of enclosing my porch.  All I’d have to do is come up with the other half.   I’d been able to save a little this year and have enough to cover half the cost (total cost would be $900).   Since I don’t own my home (I have a landlord who doesn’t care if changes are made, as long as it improves the property) I asked him if enclosing the space would be alright.   He said it would be fine, and is even allowing me to take $100 off the rent each month until the $900 it would take to start enclosing the porch is reimbursed.

Several things need to be done.  The grey paint is peeling off the cement floor of the porch, but the old paint is loose enough it could be pressure washed off.   We’d repaint it and possibly then cover it with indoor/outdoor carpeting (to cover the cracks in the cement, which it would probably cost too much to replace).   The beams that currently hold up the roof (which is actually formed by the room immediately above the area) are old, rotting, and don’t match in size.   Zach would remove these and replace them with treated natural wood 2 by 4s, and then fit the spaces in between with screens that would start about waist level and natural wood below those extending to the floor.    A simple screen door would be installed.    After that it’s just a matter of furnishing the space and making it look great.    It would be a better place for my plants (which aren’t doing too well outside right now due to an overabundance of sunlight and heat) and a great place to read, nap, have company, enjoy the sights outside, and just relax.

It would also provide a kind of extra room as well as a nifty “catio” for my cats, where they could enjoy the outdoors while not really being outdoors.     The space is large enough to be a sleeping porch in the summer, and being enclosed would certainly help keep the bugs and the heat down.  Right now, it’s usually too hot to sit out there long in midsummer, except in the evenings.

I think we’re going to start the work next weekend.  I’m pretty excited!

This is what I envision the finished result looking  something like:

enclosedporch

 

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25 things that gross me out.

Oh, yes, all these things still gross me out!

Lucky Otters Haven

nasty

I admit it.  I’m easily grossed out. That’s why I could never work as a nurse.    In this list I’m only including the things that most people don’t think are that disgusting (that’s why you won’t see vomit, poo, or green phlegm here), or things that seem very specific.   I think some of them are pretty weird.

Things That Gross Me Out

  1. The sight of blood pouring out of someone’s mouth.  Seeing blood (even a lot of it) doesn’t necessarily bother me.  But when I see a movie or show where blood is spurting from someone’s mouth and nose I have to look away.  I can’t stand seeing that.
  2. Long fingernails that are not polished. They don’t have to be dirty.  I never understood why women want long nails if they’re not going to polish them. I think it looks nasty. I have no idea why it bothers…

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Trump’s only real achievement — which he never intended.

trump_narcissism

On this day in which people concerned about climate change take to the streets of the major US cities and across the world to protest Republican plans to remove federal climate change regulations and dismantle the EPA  (I was going to attend a rally here in my city but skipped it due to needing extra sleep this morning),  something else happened:  Trump reached his long-awaited 100-day mark.

Trump, in typical malignant narcissist fashion, bragged shamelessly about how no other administration ever accomplished so much in their first 100 days (*cough* *snort*) — unless he is talking about his success in instilling fear, rage and hatred in the American populace — as well as alienating our closest allies.   In those things, he has certainly accomplished a lot, even though every policy he has tried to implement has failed miserably.   Even he has admitted, rather incoherently, about how his job is a lot harder than he expected.   Well, what did he expect?   That it would be just like “The Apprentice” and he could fire someone every week and that would be that?

Trump’s “achievements” exist only in his own deluded mind.  He constantly talks about JOBS JOBS JOBS but any jobs or improvement in our economy actually happened under Obama’s watch, not Trump’s.   He has done nothing to create any new jobs.   His Mexican border wall (intended to keep out the drug dealers and “bad honchos”),  repealing the ACA and replacing it with an abortion of a  “healthcare plan” that was really just another tax break for the richest 2%,  the failed Muslim ban, and many other things he has tried to implement have all failed.   He has broken promises:  “healthcare for everybody” turned out to be a bait and switch and a massive lie.  He promised protection from terrorists but may have provided the catalyst for a new world war — with North Korea, a country that is very close to being able to attack us with nuclear weapons — and very well might (personally I’m a lot more afraid of North Korea than I am of any Muslim terrorists).   He promised to “drain the swamp” — but only populated the swamp with privileged billionaires who care nothing about the average American and only about lining their pockets even more at the expense of the poor and middle class.   He promised he’d work harder than any other president, but lied about that too.   I remember how he complained about Obama’s occasional golf trips, yet Trump is using our hard earned tax dollars to pay for his endless vacations at the “Southern White House” in Mar-A-Lago and to keep his clearly unhappy wife ensconced in a vast, gold-plated New York City penthouse, which costs us millions per day.   He is a hypocrite of epic proportions who does the opposite of what he promises.    You can almost predict what he’ll do by his “promises” — if he makes a promise, you can be pretty sure he’ll do the opposite.

Perhaps worst of all, he gaslights us all every day, most infamously via his Twitter account where he blames everyone from the Democrats to Obama to the Freedom Caucus to “paid protesters” to the “failing New York Times” to SNL and other late night comedians for his own failings — and never, ever takes any responsibility or admits when he’s been wrong.    Russia?  They well may have infiltrated and influenced the election, yet not once has he ever criticized Putin or the Russian government.    Trump lies when there’s no reason to lie, and then concocts new lies to cover the old lies.  He is abusive and makes degrading remarks against women, Mexicans, Muslims, and people of color, and still, his supporters remain staunch in their support.   They are as deluded as he is.  Are they victims of a type of political Stockholm Syndrome?  One has to wonder.

Trump brags about how popular he is and about the YUGE crowds that turn out at his endless rallies (he is so fearful of not winning a second term that he MUST hold these rallies to garner narcissistic supply), but the numbers fail to back these claims up.    Trump points to FOX News and The National Enquirer (no joke) as his go-to sources that prove how popular and successful he is, and dismisses legitimate news sources such as the New York Times and Washington Post as fake news.   Basically, if any news is critical of him, it’s fake.   Like all malignant narcissists, he is unable to tolerate any criticism and desperately hangs onto alternative facts he sees in the right wing tabloids and FOX & Friends that paint him as a hero and savior.  Those of us who understand the narcissistic mind are not surprised by his deluded claims and lies about how great he’s doing and how popular he is.    In actuality, Trump has the lowest approval ranking of any new president in recent history.   And yet his staunchest supporters stick by him like dog poop sticks to a shoe.

Yes, Trump’s purported achievements exist only in his own mind — except for one big achievement he never intended:  he has inspired Democrats and independents who oppose his bone-headed, heartless and draconian policies to get involved in politics again.   He has sparked (mostly peaceful) protests across the nation and even the whole world, in opposition to his plans to destroy America and its most loved institutions.   People are scared of him — and are becoming more vocal in their opposition and have vowed to vote out Republicans in the 2018 midterm elections.  In my opinion, Trump has almost no chance of winning a second term, if he even survives this one.

Had Hillary Clinton won the election, nothing would have changed.   She was unpopular with both parties, and if she’d won, Democrats and progressive independents would have succumbed to even deeper apathy and cynicism than they already were — and would — once again — have failed to turn out to vote in the 2018 and 2020 elections.   Republicans would have amped up their rage and hatred to levels we can’t even imagine now.  The end result would be that every branch of government would be even more hamstrung and gerrymandered by the Republicans than they are today.   So for this reason, I am actually glad Donald Trump won the election.   There’s one other good thing he’s done, once again never intended by him.   He’s educating the entire world about what a narcissistic leader is really like, and with God on our side, he won’t cause too much damage and we will have learned our lesson and never elect anyone like him again.

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Contrived Helplessness

This post caught my eye and while reading it, I realized I used to do exactly this.   I think contrived helplessness isn’t limited to the fragile/covert type of narcissist though.  I think it’s also fairly common in people with codependency issues, or who suffer from BPD or C-PTSD.

When I used to pull the “I can’t do anything” card, it was never intentional;  I didn’t want to be that way!  I really believed I was that helpless.  I’d been programmed to believe I was incompetent and couldn’t do anything.  I didn’t know how to be any other way, but looking back on myself in those days, I realize now that I did it because I was so starved for attention and sympathy.   Getting pity and help from others was the only “power” I thought I had, but if you had asked me back then if I did it for attention, I would have said no and meant it.   Later on, I hated that kind of attention because it could be so patronizing and made me feel even more incompetent and helpless.

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Grace for my Heart

It’s Narcissist Friday!     

Every once in a while I come up with a term for a narcissistic behavior only to find that the term is already being used for something else. I have wanted to write about a certain type of narcissist who controls others by being needy. I thought that the helplessness these people exhibit is a learned behavior. So I looked up “Learned helplessness.” Yes, it is a psychological term used for those who have tried a certain task repeatedly without success, then have become convinced that they are unable to do the task. A kidnap victim, for example, may try to run away and fail over and over, then give up and become unable to take advantage of real opportunities. Some of the more famous kidnapping cases, like Elizabeth Smart and Jaycee Dugard, may be examples of this inability in victims to help themselves.

Of…

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Snowflakes are badass.

snowflake_meme

It needed to be said, so I made this meme.

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