Narcissist Zombie.

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Dog’s Pavlov.

Credit: saynotocrack.com

Show-off.

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I Liked the Motivational Ones Better

This made me laugh and everyone can use one of those.
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Dream Big, Dream Often

Credit: Mark Anderson/www.andertoons.com

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Roz Chast’s weird universe.

Everyone who reads this blog probably already knows I go a little nuts over Roz Chast cartoons. This is possibly my favorite cartoon of hers ever. It’s from her book Parallel Universes.

I just love how weird she is.

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(I think the snowman was photoshopped–the original cartoon had a sort of stick-like creature–but it’s actually kind of funny this way).

Adventures of S.K. “The Loser”: cartoon diary of myself at age 22 (two of two)

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My expression here definitely reflected my attitude at the time about dating.

This second cartoon story (also drawn in 1981) describes the way I longed for a fulfilling romantic relationship, but at the same time was quite ambivalent about the prospect, not having had good role models with my own parents’ marriage, and living in a time where marriage and family were still looked upon as a second-rate occupation for women who were “losers”, i.e. couldn’t do anything else. And yet I still longed for that dream husband and family…

As it turned out, I didn’t marry until I was 27–5 years after I drew this cartoon. Of course, THAT relationship was far from ideal. In the mental state I was in (and already attracted to narcissistic men), I was right to be wary!

The first cartoon story can be seen here.

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I really wish I would have continued this hobby…

Adventures of S.K. the “Loser”: cartoon diary of myself at age 22 (one of two)

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Generally, what my state of mind was like back in the day.

I found two cartoon stories I drew in 1981 that describe exactly where my head was at when I was 22–the same age my daughter is now.

At the time, I was juggling a full time job as a billing clerk (which I hated) with being a full-time college student. Believe me, even for a 22 year old, this wasn’t easy. I was a psychology major with a strong interest (minor) in art. I also liked to write, as I do now. At the time, I thought I might become an art therapist (which would have required people-skills and patience with others I simply did not possess).

But my real interests lay in romance–like most borderlines, I drifted from one intense romantic relationship to the next–and THAT will be described in the next set of cartoons, which I’ll post after these.

While a sense of humor about myself is evident in both these cartoons, my insecurity and unhappiness with myself and my overwhelming anxiety about my future (which didn’t turn out to be that great) could not have been more apparent. Of course, insecurity and identity issues are normal for anyone at age 22, but I think I was more consumed by my feelings of insecurity and lack of belonging than most. At the time, I had no idea about Aspergers or that I might be Borderline. I just thought of myself as a neurotic basketcase tormented by inner demons. I must have had some optimism however, as the outcome (at least in the first story) is generally hopeful.

It’s interesting that I referred to myself as “The Loser” but not too surprising given my background and low self esteem. “S.K.” were my actual initials. I wish I had drawn more of these. I only made two sets.

I hope these are readable; they are very old and the papers they were drawn on very large, so the print may be hard to read in some places. They are posted in order; PLEASE CLICK ON THE PANELS TO ENLARGE.

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ETA: I accidentally posted this publicly with only the first six panels; I’ve added the final three so the story should make more sense now.

Read the second cartoon story here.

Laughing for no reason.

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I do this all the time. Does that mean I’m crazy?

Is this an improvement?

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Sure, this cartoon is funny, but is also worrisome. If this is true, then we are raising a generation of narcissists. It also shows how little teachers are respected these days.

How to be happy!

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If only it were so easy.

Dogs are awesome teachers, friends, and therapists. They never worry, they’ll never mindfuck you, they will never lie to you, they live for the moment and enjoy simple things, they’re loyal and protective, they will listen to all your problems without judging or putting you down, and no matter how bad you think you’ve been, they still love you unconditionally.