I had a good feeling about this blog today and just logged in and…

holyshit

Message from WordPress:

A spike in your stats
Your blog, Lucky Otter’s Haven & Museum of Narcissists, appears to be getting more traffic than usual!

74 hourly views

7 hourly views on average

Is it the changes I made last night to this blog or traffic caused by the surprise appearance by (in)famous narcissist Sam Vaknin?

But why question it? It’s just awesome, is all.

stewie

ETA: I don’t know how to make a screencap of the graph, but this was my best day ever — 436 views!

I figured it out. It wasn’t hard. My stats page shows the two articles about Mr. Vaknin are KILLING it on the web. They both have a lot more views than anything else I’ve posted, and one of them has been linked to Twitter 31 times and both combined on Facebook even more times than that. Going viral maybe?!?!?!o_o
My first article about Sam is now on PAGE TWO of Google. And I thought my article about my son being furry was popular. Whoa.

I know I sound like a horrible narcissist and I apologize for that, but damn, this is EXCITING! I don’t expect it to last though.

Mr. Vaknin should be getting plenty of narcissistic ego-boosting from the fact he’s such a stats-booster. I’m sure he already knows that though. LOL

Did you notice any changes?

You may have noticed a few changes on this blog.

— I changed the name of the blog by adding “and Museum of Narcissists” after “Lucky Otter’s Haven.” I wanted to title to include something about its primary subject matter, even though as always, I will write about other things too. I considered “Lucky Otter’s Museum of Narcissists” but that seemed to sound too much like a freak show and the “haven” part is important, because I want victims of abuse to feel like this really is a haven, because it is.

— After changing the title, it went to two lines, and I didn’t like the look of that. I wanted the title to all fit on one line, so I changed the font style from Jubilat Regular to Jubilat Light and reduced the font size down from 3 to 2.

— I changed the default user icons from the standard WordPress design to the monsters. They’re cuter.

I hope everyone likes the changes.

Blogging…

showandtell

…it’s Show and Tell for grown up geeks.

Can I do it? Can I do it?

littleengine

“I think I can. I think I can.”
–The Little Engine who Could

Although my blog has been definitely picking up (a couple of my articles even have been appearing on PAGE ONE of Google!!!), September 21st is still my “Best Day Ever”–the day my “I’m Frustrated” rant was reblogged by OM at Harsh Reality and I was swarmed with new viewers and followers (354 views that day to be exact). It was a heady day, especially because I was new at this and had only been blogging for 11 days. Prior to that I had a pitiful 12 followers and almost no comments or views (and that’s why I was so frustrated and wrote that rant).

This month, I’ve noticed my views have been increasing a lot. If I knew how to “screencap” the graph on my stats page, I would. But now I’m getting views and comments even on days I haven’t posted anything new, and I’m getting more views every day. So far today I have a whopping 244 views, which is the most I’ve had since September 21. That’s exciting!

I’m hoping to beat my “best day ever.” I still have a few hours left. I wonder if I can do it?

A little validation goes a long way

I was checking my stats, and under the “referrers” section, I found a new referrer: League of Geeks. I clicked it on, and it took me to a forum topic about furries. I scrolled down and found the post that mentioned my most popular article.

It’s a very long post, so I’ll just excerpt from it.

My husband and I like to joke that the only true common thread with furries is with how we are screwed up socially in some way. It is not something to be upset or afraid about, though. Most furries find it liberating to behave contrary to the status quo as an escape. Others find the courage to do things behind the mask of a suit they never could have done otherwise (this article is an outstanding read, and could give you some inspiration: https://otterlover58.wordpress.com/2014/09/20/my-son-is-furry-got-a-problem-with-that/).

This was a very little thing, but it still made me feel like a million dollars after having had such an otherwise crappy day. I know most of you bloggers can relate. This sort of validation is one of the things that keeps us motivated. At least it is for me.

WordPress Classic Editor vs. the “new, improved” Editor

beepboopshutup
Yeah. I made this. It sucks. That thing that looks like a dandelion drawn by a 5 year old is supposed to be a ninja star weapon. Oh, well.

For some reason, WordPress keeps switching me over to the new editor (the beep beep boop one) and I have to manually switch it back to classic, which I like much better.

First of all, I think the classic editor is more readable. Second, my photos automatically resize themselves to the size I specified in my settings. The new editor doesn’t do that (maybe there’s a glitch), and I wind up having to upload my photos to Photobucket, and then resize them there, and that is time consuming. But the worst thing I noticed is the new editor doesn’t always save my changes. If I go in to edit a post again (I usually edit a post anywhere between 5 and 10 times, sometimes even more for longer posts), all my previous changes are lost. I finally figured out if I use the classic editor, my photos default to the correct size and I don’t have to worry about my changes being lost. Easy peasy!

I just wish I knew how to keep the classic editor from switching to the new one. I really don’t know what’s better about it. I really don’t need juvenile prompts like “Your post is lookin’ great!” and “Beep Beep Boop.” I’m not in kindergarten. And I will be the judge of whether my post looks great or not.

If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
Remember New Coke? It was an epic fail. Everyone still wanted “Classic Coke.”

What do other bloggers prefer? The new editor or the classic mode?

Counting down!

top10

This is my 98th post.  Only two more and I’ll have 100.    Back on September 10th when I started this blog,  I promised myself I’d write one post a day.  I wasn’t sure I could do it.  But  I’ve outdone myself, since September 10th is only 60 days ago and this is my 98th post.   That motivates me.  I think I might be able to reach my goal by tonight.

OM (Harsh Reality) always likes to help us new bloggers and provides regular showcases for us to link to our blogs on his site.     Today he asked what our Top Ten posts are.   I had never looked to see what they were before, and wasn’t too surprised to see my first Furry article at the top of the list, since that is the only article I’ve written that STILL always appears in my Top Posts list on my homepage.  It also got a huge boost from Twitter.     I think it’s one of my best written articles and the title is awesome.      The #2 spot article, which was a rant back when I was a newbie and wasn’t getting many views or followers, got a big boost from a reblog by OM, which gave my entire blog the push into the cyber-universe it needed.  Never again would I log into my account in the morning to find only crickets and tumbleweeds.

 

Here is my entire Top 10.

2014-08-11 to Today

So today (or the latest, tomorrow) I will reach 100 posts.  I’m also nearing another milestone:  200 followers.     I never thought my blog would be this active in two short months.   I want to take this opportunity to say “thanks” to all you awesome people who are following and reading my blog.

Two kinds of stealth trolls

stealthtroll

In two earlier posts I wrote about online bullies and trolls (not exactly the same thing, but close enough). I won’t explain here how they differ and are the same (you can read the articles which I’ve posted links at the end of this article), but I neglected to mention stealth trolls. Stealth trolls seem benign, but can wreak havoc on web forums and social media. I will describe two types of stealth trolls. There are probably others.

The Concern Troll

concerntrolls

The Urban Dictionary defines a concern troll as:

A person who posts on a blog thread, in the guise of “concern,” to disrupt dialogue or undermine morale by pointing out that posters and/or the site may be getting themselves in trouble, usually with an authority or power. They point out problems that don’t really exist. The intent is to derail, stifle, control, the dialogue. It is viewed as insincere and condescending.

A concern troll on a progressive blog might write, “I don’t think it’s wise to say things like that because you might get in trouble with the government.” Or, “This controversy is making your side look disorganized.

The concern troll’s M.O. is stealth. They appear harmless. In the guise of “concern,” the troll infiltrates the website, seeming helpful, but their true intention is not to help, but to disrupt the community, dialogue or morale on the site. They probably know little if anything about the subject matter and their complaints are of a general nature. Their “concern” makes them feel superior. Concern trolls are probably narcissistic or even psychopathic, and their self-righteous “concern” makes them feel superior. Any attempt to pin them down and explain their “concerns” in greater detail or a request to explain the topic being discussed will usually cause them to disappear, but they’re likely to reappear under a “sockpuppet” account (another handle). The sockpuppet may be more aggressive in their trolling behavior and may even bully individual members or make openly hostile remarks about the site or its subject matter. A troll’s goal is to destroy the online community in the usual manner: by making its members leave the site.

The Triangulator.

triangleman

This is a dangerous troll who who pits people against each other by sending private messages containing lies about another user. It’s an online form of the triangulating that psychopaths and narcissists do. They are almost always found on social media and forums. I’ll give a hypothetical example of what a Triangulator does. Let’s say Lisa and Brian are online friends. The Triangulator (let’s call him John) befriends both Lisa and Brian. One day John sends Lisa a PM saying Brian told him that Brian thinks she’s dumb (he never said this). Lisa gets mad and sends Brian a PM saying her feelings are hurt that he went behind her back and told John she was dumb. Brian says he never told John he thought she was dumb, and he doesn’t think she’s dumb anyway. Lisa isn’t sure who to believe, so the trust between her and Brian is compromised. John then sends Brian a PM telling him Lisa thinks Brian acts like a know it all (she never said this). When Brian talks to Lisa and she tells him she never said this, he isn’t sure who to believe and the trust between them is compromised. The Triangulator can destroy a friendship this way, and that’s exactly what he wants to accomplish. By using this tactic, Triangulators can totally break down communication on a site and cause regular users to defect.

Don’t feed the trolls.

Trolls are simply narcissists who derive pleasure upsetting and destroying a healthy online community. If you can’t ban them yourself, the best way to deal with a troll is to report them to the admin or if that isn’t possible, ignore them.

Earlier articles about online bullies and trolls:
Internet Psychopaths: the difference between Trolls and Bullies
Internet Trolls are Psychopaths

Ever have one of those days…

…where you just don’t feel like writing anything? I’m having one of them today. I’ve found they happen just after I write a “big” post about a major issue in my life. It’s as if I need a few days to decompress and get my creative mojo back. I feel guilty if I don’t write, so I’m posting this so at least I can say I wrote something.

I decided to add a poll to flesh this out a little more, plus I’m genuinely curious about other bloggers’ writing habits.

Fluff piece

I try to balance my blog without losing its focus on narcissism and related personality disorders, because that’s the whole reason I started this blog–to help myself and others enmeshed in psychopathic relationships and/or recovering from the wounds they inflicted on us. So if I notice too many posts in a row unrelated to narcissism, I’ll deliberately post a few about narcissism. But even people interested in a topic can grow bored, so if I think I’ve blogged too much about narcissism, or if I notice they’re not getting as many hits or likes, I figure people need a break and I’ll post about something else.

I also try to include a fluff piece here and there to keep things light–something humorous or silly, or a nice photo with just a few words. Today was going to be my day to do that, since I haven’t posted one in a while. My post “Saying goodbye to a friend” qualifies I suppose, but its subject matter is so sad I have to post a real fluff piece today. So here it is.

fluffpiece
Fluff balls!