I guess I won’t be going anywhere today.

The view from my window at around 7:30 AM:

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8:45 AM:

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It shows no sign of stopping anytime soon.

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No white Christmas this year.

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I’m not a big fan of snow or cold weather, but this entire month has been unseasonably warm, and after two or three days of moderately cold weather (but still above freezing), the springlike weather is back. Her’es a screenshot of the weather forecast for the next week.

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As you can see, thunderstorms are supposed to move in tonight, with possible flooding or even severe storms possible–and stick around through Christmas Day. As much as I usually dislike snow, I really wouldn’t mind seeing a little of the white stuff on Christmas. Somehow, thunderstorms and rain don’t seem to fit the mood of the season. Maybe the weather isn’t feeling much in the holiday spirit. It’s just been a very weird month, weather-wise.

 

The scientific reason why the east coast has been so warm.

Alright, snow, you’re pretty. Satisfied now?

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As much as I hate cold weather and snow, I have to admit this scene when I looked out my window today is beautiful. Sure, it means another day of not being able to get to work (and my water pipes still haven’t been fixed) but it’s a good day to sleep in and blog.

I might even take a walk in it later or let my dog Dexter run around in it (he loves the snow).

So much snow is unusual here in western North Carolina, but the weather’s been weird this year.

Go away, winter.

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When I opened my front door this morning, I saw this lovely scene.

I’ve had it. This hasn’t been such a bad winter overall, until this month. If we’re going to get snow and sub-zero temperatures here in western North Carolina, it’s most likely going to be in February and March.

Nature, you’re so predictable.

This month has been hell for me climatically. Last week the temperatures dropped down into the single digits and my pipes froze, even though I kept them dripping at a fast clip to keep them from freezing. The only water I still had was a little trickle of ICE COLD water from the kitchen sink. Things stayed like this for an entire week.

Two days ago, the temperatures rose to the low 50’s and I waited impatiently for the water to return. Instead, when I went into the kitchen yesterday morning, I noticed the laminate parquet-look floor I just put in a year ago was soaking wet and squishy under my feet. Further investigation revealed its source–a pipe had burst behind the wall of the kitchen and water was seeping through the floor. I listened and heard what sounded like someone taking a shower inside the wall.

My landlord told me to turn off the water (which requires going outside and lifting the manhole cover by the road) and he’d send someone out to look. His handyman, a drunk named Roger who never really fixes anything because he’s cheap (my landlord doesn’t want to spend any money), is famous for just jimmy rigging things instead of fixing or replacing them. He might as well just carry Duct tape around to use for everything. Last year when this happened, he “fixed” the pipes even though they are probably the original ones that came with the house when it was built in 1908. Because the pipes are uninsulated and UNDER the house, he had to rip out part of the kitchen floor and an entire wall to get to the pipes. Of course he never insulated them, just patched them up somehow (probably using Duct tape). He replaced the original kitchen wall with an ugly piece of ill-fitting plywood. I painted it to make it at least a little presentable. I put the new kitchen floor in because of the damage done to the old one (and the old one was really ugly anyway–dark brown 1970s speckled linoleum).

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So of course the pipes burst again and now there’s no water at all because I had to turn it off to keep the leak from doing further damage. I haven’t had a proper shower in a week. The dishes are piled in the sink and starting to stink. I may go to the truck stop today to take a shower if I can drive there later because the feeling of dirty grunginess is very depressing and I probably smell. I can’t get to my job today (again!) because of the snow on the roads and it’s still snowing. I think I might go out and fill a bunch of milk jugs (which I keep handy for such emergencies) with snow, let them melt by the heat, heat the water on the stove, and fill the tub so I can take a bath. It will probably take hours to do this and about 100 milk jugs worth of snow, but I really need a fucking bath! My hair is hanging in greasy strings and my scalp is starting to itch. How did people before the days of indoor plumbing stand all the dirtiness?

I am also losing money. Last week I only worked two days: one day the office closed due to the icy road conditions and the other two days (when my car was having its transmission rebuilt) there wasn’t enough work to justify having anyone pick me up. My roommate’s car won’t start either and there was no one else to drive me back and forth to work. Thank the Lord, my car’s fixed now (and runs better than it has in two years) but I still have no f*cking water.

Now the temperatures are dropping again, into the teens, and the handyman, who apparently finally realized the house needed replumbing and was going to come out today to start working on that, just called to say he wouldn’t be able to do it with the temperatures this low. It’s supposed to remain this cold all week.

This really bites. I hate winter with all my body, mind, and soul. Maybe I need to just move to Florida or something where I will never have to deal with freezing pipes, cars too cold to start, icy and snowy mountain roads, and just plain being cold all the time.

Why anyone in their right mind could love winter (except for wealthy people who don’t have to drive to a job and get to ski and snowboard all winter) is beyond my comprehension.

Spring, hurry up and get here! PLEASE.

No water. Is this 2015 or 1915?

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What century am I living in?

Now I’m without water or a car. My car’s still in the shop (probably until Monday), my roommate’s car needs a new battery, and for two days the bathroom pipes have been frozen even though I let them drip when the temperatures dropped below freezing the other night. The only running water in the house is the toilet and the kitchen faucet.

But two hours ago I lost those too. And I can’t get to the store to fill my water jugs that I keep around for emergencies, or even buy bottled water. It’s -2 degrees out, with an even colder wind chill. That’s somewhat unusual in this part of the country, where even in the mountains, the temperatures rarely get below the 20’s if you’re in a valley (as I am).

There’s a little hard, icy snow on the ground but not much. I may have to go outside and try to withstand the ice cold temps to scrape some off the ground to fill some pots and pans, which I can then boil. At least there’s electricity.
Oops, I had better shut up. I could jinx that too.

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I called the water company to find out if the problem was my pipes (since my tub and bathroom sink haven’t worked for two days) or something else. It turns out there’s a water outage that is effecting the entire neighborhood. I was assured it should be back on by 10 PM tonight–that is if the pipes to my kitchen sink and toilet don’t freeze too, since I haven’t been able to drip the faucet or flush the toilet.

But you know what? People lived like this for thousands of years. You will never miss what you never had, or have no concept of. People even today, in developing countries, live with no running water or electricity, and they never complain. We have become so entitled.

At least I have the Internet so I can whine.

At least winter won’t egg your house.

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My son tweeted this, but what’s he talking about? He lives in Florida!

why I can’t stand snow

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“Sooooo….I hear it’s gonna be a rough winter this year.”
ARGGGHHHH!
I hear this every single year, starting in about August. It drives me insane. First of all, how does anyone know how rough the winter’s gonna be? Weather forecasters can’t even predict the weather right most of the time DAYS ahead, never mind for the long term. Flipping a coin would probably do just as good a job predicting the weather. Whenever people use this phrase, I want to slam my head through a brick wall. Why? Because it almost seems like a taunt to me, as if they WANT it it snow all winter. It’s also usually said by someone who has four wheel drive and fancy snow tires. They’re prepared.
Well guess what? I’m not.

Sure, snow is pretty and all, and it’s nice on CHRISTMAS because it suits the season and on Christmas, most of us can lounge around at home in fuzzy slippers and pajamas all day if we choose. Unless we’re visiting relatives, we don’t have to DRIVE IN IT.

I detest driving in snow. It scares me. No, scratch that. It TERRIFIES me. I drive an old car and my tires are almost bald. I don’t have four wheel drive, and I slide all over the road. For me, it doesn’t matter if it’s snow or ice. I STILL SLIDE. And that’s fucking scary. I feel like I’m putting my life at risk every day I have to drive to work when it’s snowing. I’m sorry I don’t have 4-wheel drive and new tires like you do.

I also hate being cold. Winter is incredibly overrated. Think about it: it’s cold, it’s wet, it gets dark early and stays dark late into the morning, and everything is dead and colorless. The only colors to be seen are gray, brown, black and deadly WHITE if there is snow on the ground (until it turns into black and brown slush a day or so later). After the colorful festivities of Christmas (which is barely into the winter anyway), there’s nothing left to look forward to until spring.

You also have to wear layers and layers of heavy, uncomfortable clothing that takes up time in the morning that could be better spent surfing the web, writing a new blog post, reading your daily affirmation, or leisurely nursing your cup of hot coffee instead of gulping it down. I can’t stand the itchy scarves, gloves that make you drop things, sweaters that make you look like you gained about 50 pounds, and hats that make your hair look like crap when you peel them off and sometimes give you electric shocks.

Oh, and there’s the cleanup too. Spending half an hour scraping the white stuff off my car windows and shoveling it out of my driveway so I can get where I’m going is not my idea of fun.

For normal people I just don’t get the love of snow.

I suppose I can understand someone who doesn’t have to work liking snow. They can sit and stare out the window at it all day wearing their jammies, or go out and build a snowman. That’s why kids like it–they get a day off of school. Most adults do not. If I want to see snow I’ll look at a picture of it, thank you very much.

I can understand why someone who can afford to go skiing every winter would love snow. But how many people are there who can actually afford to do that? Definitely a lot fewer than the number of idiots who smugly announce what a rough winter it’s going to be.

So I have one thing to say to you if you say those words to me:
Shut the fuck up and go fall in a snowbank.

I’ll take the bugs, heat and humidity of summer any day.