Search terms roundup #4

Posted on February 17, 2015 by luckyotter

I love looking at my search terms. These are my terms over the past 7 days. My comments appear bolded in brackets. Past lists have been funnier, but there’s some gems here too.

covert somatic narcissist 5
songs about narcissists 3
psychopathy scapegoating 3
where can i see the movie the narcissist 2
“people of the lie” 2
songs about narcissists lovers 2 [almost time for me to do another roundup of narc songs]
is david berg a psychopath 2
otterlover 58, blog 2 [Here I am!]
wrinkly peep dick 2 [LMAO! Are you for real?]
merrimints candy recipe 2
laughing at the narcissist 1
songs related to narcissism 1
dissease of needing attention/adulation 1 [it’s called Narcissism]
being abused in relationship quotes 1
narcissistic fathers 1
narcissists no sense of humor 1
narcissistic family values 1
psychopaths and pets 1
perspective pictures 1
difference between grandiose and vulnerable narcissism 1
healing quotes for aspergers 1
malignant narcissist so envious of daughter to put black magic curse upon her 1 [OMG really?]
beware of the internet child abuse 1
i ‘ m frustrated 1
abusive boyfriend quotes 1
tired of being treated like a stupid person because i have an. accent 1 [I’m sorry]
can a psychopath be cured 1
narcissit franticly 1
narcissism and supernatural 1
the movie/ narcissist 1
borderline personality disorder 1
can narcissists cry 1
songs that can be about narcissist 1
12 step programme to heal a narcissts 1 [I don’t think there is one]
vaknin narcissism 1
narcissistic personality disorder animal abuse 1
narcissists eyes 1
beth psycopath child 1
covert narcissists and extreme neglect 1
are narcissists spoiled or abused as children 1
narcissists and their victim quotes 1
smith and cult stockholm syndrome 1
the film ordinary people and triangulation in relationships 1
sam vaknin narcissists true self 1
i dated a flying monkey who loves a narcissist [that sucks]
mom the exhibitionist 1
narssisistic songs 1
only child of narcissistic mother 1
diets for christian empaths [there’s a diet for everything, I guess.]
the narcissistic stare 1
nature vs nurture debate nurture side 1
jehovah’s witness furry fandom [interesting]
man withholding sex aspergers or cerebral narcissist 1
my sons a furry 1 [this article at the top of page 1 of Google now]
narcissistic country love songs 1
what the hell is a narc [you’ve come to the right place to find out]
scientific findings about emoticon use 1
bpd psychopath gaze 1
exhibitionist mothers 1
1960s-1970s ranch house plans 1
narcissist the movie 1
greek safe place 1
do psychopaths hate animals 1
fuck you snow 1 [Yeah, give that white stuff a piece of your mind!]
when narcs go into rages are they dangerous 1
divorce 1
is sam vaknin a narcissist

Pain faces.

Posted on February 13, 2015 by luckyotter

My friend tweeted this article from Blogspot and since I had no original ideas tonight, I’m reposting it here. This is hilarious! 😀

Boyfriend Doesn’t Have Ebola. Probably.

I took Boyfriend to the Emergency Room last night because he was vomiting up vast quantities of what I thought was blood but actually it was just Craisins. You guys, if you feel like you may become violently ill in the near future, stay away from red food. Failure to do so may create an atmosphere of unnecessary panic and chaos.

Anyway, the doctor wanted to make sure that Boyfriend didn’t have SARS or stomach AIDS or something, so he had to poke him a lot. While he was doing this to Boyfriend, he pointed to a little reference chart on the wall and asked Boyfriend to rate his pain:

You’ve probably seen some version of that chart before. You may also have noticed how inadequate it is at helping you. Based on the faces, this is my interpretation of the chart:

0: Haha! I’m not wearing any pants!

2: Awesome! Someone just offered me a free hot dog!

4: Huh. I never knew that about giraffes.

6: I’m sorry about your cat, but can we talk about something else now? I’m bored.

8: The ice cream I bought barely has any cookie dough chunks in it. This is not what I expected and I am disappointed.

10:You hurt my feelings and now I’m crying!

None of that is medically useful and it doesn’t even have all the numbers, so I made a better one with all the numbers:

Click to enlarge

0: Hi. I am not experiencing any pain at all. I don’t know why I’m even here.

1: I am completely unsure whether I am experiencing pain or itching or maybe I just have a bad taste in my mouth.

2: I probably just need a Band Aid.

3: This is distressing. I don’t want this to be happening to me at all.

4: My pain is not fucking around.

5: Why is this happening to me??

6: Ow. Okay, my pain is super legit now.

7: I see Jesus coming for me and I’m scared.

8: I am experiencing a disturbing amount of pain. I might actually be dying. Please help.

9: I am almost definitely dying.

10: I am actively being mauled by a bear.

11: Blood is going to explode out of my face at any moment.

Too Serious For Numbers: You probably have ebola. It appears that you may also be suffering from Stigmata and/or pinkeye.

Used toys.

Posted on February 11, 2015 by luckyotter

Click to enlarge.

Fun with spam #3

Posted on February 5, 2015 by luckyotter

I hate how much spam I’m getting and most of it’s mind numbingly boring, but here’s a couple more gems worth posting before I delete them. See, spam can be fun!

Submitted on 2015/02/05 at 7:10 pm
Hi there Dear, are you genuinely visiting this web site
on a regular basis, if so then you will without doubt obtain pleasant knowledge. [That’s good to know.]

Submitted on 2015/02/05 at 6:38 pm
Previous research has suggested that the virus has been quite common in camels for at least the past 20 years, and was likely making the jump into humans. [should I be worried about this?]

Tonnemacher remains looking forward to breasts convalescence but it’s not really delaying the woman’s straight down. She has pumped up about the woman reduce and wants some other survivors to know whenever their head of hair evolves returning, they will should never think twice about at risk of your hairstylist. [sounds logical]

Puppy owners Hayley Sulley, 30, and Della Woods, Twenty nine.
The particular Athens Banner-Herald [link deleted] studies which a company director concealed the actual Navigation unit within the carry, inserted it in a handbag of clothes as well as tossed the idea into the variety container. [um, wut?]

Submitted on 2015/02/06 at 2:45 am
I knew I needed a platform for that molding
of the deer. [I really needed to know that.]

Funny cat photo of the day.

Image

I love Roz Chast “card” cartoons

Posted on February 1, 2015 by luckyotter

I just can’t get enough of her cartoons and I just love these fake “card” ads. The first one, “Narcissist Cards” is my favorite, and included on the Joke Page. The others are pretty great too.

She totally gets it.

These must be for the codependents.

If you lost your source of narcissistic supply, you can send yourself these and be your own supply!

You never can find the right thing to say…

More fun with spam.

Posted on January 31, 2015 by luckyotter

My spam is usually pretty boring, but here are two bizarre spam comments I got today. Bluebird of Bitterness will be proud!

A second WARNING: Probabilities are, as soon as you enter Wendy, your Arousal Meter will fill completely and quickly release, therefore invoking a far too abbreviated end towards the challenge. You are going to earn five from the likely 10 Existence Factors and move on along with your Existence, but it’s a somewhat embarrassing strategy to end factors.

Select comment mulberry bush nursery
Make contact with each of the women in your checklist at the least two months ahead of the event to determine what weekends they are 100 % free and what they like to do. It aids to get a checklist of concerns in front of you should you don’t know every guest personally, that’s sometimes the case with giant bridal events. The concerns are usually, ” What sports activities do you like to perform?” “Do you love board games?” “Are you interested in spa providers?”.

My Aspergers almost got me arrested.

Posted on January 28, 2015 by luckyotter

So I’m on jury duty today, but I got the dates confused and thought the 28th was tomorrow. I had put a time off request in at work almost a month ago for this, so when I showed up at work this morning, my boss gave me a strange look and asked what I was doing there.

“Huh?” I ask stupidly.
“Don’t you remember you had jury duty today?” My boss looks at me like I have toadstools growing out of my head.
“What? Oh–um, that was today?” I start rummaging around in my bag to find my phone so I can check the date. There’s actually a calendar right on the wall behind my boss’s head.

“Wait a second–that was on the 28th. Today’s the 28th?” I finally dig out my phone, fumble with it and it drops on the floor.
My boss is smirking at me. I’m so embarrassed. People are watching this exchange. I bend over to pick up the phone.
“Today is the 28th,” she says like she’s talking to a two year old. “You better get going or there will be a warrant out for you.”
I look at the phone. She’s right.
I’m blushing fire engine red. She’s laughing at me.
“Sorry, well, I better go then.” Frantically I pull on my jacket and scarf and leave.

I drive dangerously, above the speed limit. First I have to go home and get the paperwork that includes a free parking ticket for the courthouse. I grab what I need and get back in the car and speed downtown, weaving in and out of traffic, which is something I never do. I’m usually a very careful driver.
Parking downtown is always a nightmare, but at least I get free parking today.
I was supposed to be at the courthouse at 8:45; I make it by 9:35.
I show the woman at the desk my paperwork and mumble an apology about getting confused about what day it was. She’s surprisingly nice about it and it turns out they haven’t even started yet.
There are two cases. I don’t know yet if I’ll be called to serve.
We get a two hour lunch, enough time for me to go home and write this post. I have to be back at 1:50, so I’ll wrap this up, eat some soup and leave.

Inability to focus on the here and now and being scatterbrained is an Aspie curse that makes life very embarrassing sometimes. I’ve been accused of having no common sense, and it’s sort of true. But it’s kind of funny too. It could have been bad if my boss hadn’t reminded me. I could be in handcuffs right now.