The day you realize it never was you.

“First you start to feel like maybe there never was anything wrong with you.  That perhaps the people you called family were just horrible human beings that foisted their nefarious motives on you.  They lied about you, about your worthlessness and your unlovableness and your hopeless loser life.  Lies!”

Katie, Dreams of a Better World Blog

*****

I read somewhere (sorry, I can’t remember the source) that the “truth teller” who usually becomes the scapegoat of a narcissistic family, is actually the most mentally healthy family member, even if the family has everyone convinced that person is the craziest one.

 

Losing the false “I’m unlovable” scapegoat baggage

Katie has done it again! I could relate to every single word in this post. I could have written this myself.  There’s no need for me to editorialize any further.

Please leave comments on the original post.

A time for peace: my last post

Don’t panic–this isn’t about my blog.

I just discovered Katie’s incredible blog a few short months ago, but I feel like we’re kindred spirits, and she has taught me so, so, SO much!

I don’t even know Katie’s last name (or even if this is her real first name) or where she lives.  I don’t know what she looks like.  I do not have her email address. Yet I feel like we could be sisters–or lifelong friends.

The other day in another post, I quoted a Zen proverb: “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” Katie was a teacher who came into my life at exactly the right time, and helped me resolve my issues with forgiveness and my guilt feelings over having “forgiven” the narcissists who abused me. Others have told me I shouldn’t. I was at a crossroads. But Katie’s beautifully written posts did something few other bloggers have been able to do–they brought me to tears: healing tears.  Because what she writes about is always exactly what I need at the time I read it, and her words are like poetry. Her blog let me know that forgiveness is not only okay, it’s what God wants. It’s the only way to emotional freedom.

Katie, if you read this, I do hope you’ll come back sometime and write again. In the meantime, PLEASE leave your blog posts up. Someone who needs them (as I did) may stumble across them in a month, a year, 3 years, even 10–and find comfort and answers through your blog.  There are many narcissist abuse blogs out there in cyberspace, but there’s only one  Dreams of a Better World.   I’d like to stay in touch with you. You can find my email in the “contact me” information.