My codependent “marriage” to a narcissistic boss.

I completely forgot about this post! Unhealthy, codependent relationships with narcissists are not limited to romantic relationships, marriages, and familial relationships. You can definitely be trapped in a codependent “marriage” with your boss (or anyone else you have frequent contact with, especially when unequal balance of power is a natural part of the relationship, as there might be between therapist and patient).

Lucky Otters Haven


In late 2004, I was hired as a cashier at a local convenience store. My boss, John, was a flamboyantly gay man around my age who seemed fond of me at first. He was friendly and likeable in a way that didn’t offend my Aspie social reticence. We often worked alone together, and because he spent most of the time talking my ear off, I wasn’t required to add much to the conversation. I was his captive audience when we weren’t serving customers. John was bright and I found his one-sided monologues interesting if sometimes a little strange.

I’d hear everything about John’s exciting life, from his four Shar-Pei’s antics (he was a huge dog lover) to his once-a-month visits to the spa for regular colonic irrigations–he discussed these publicly, in the most intimate detail, even with customers–as if he was talking about what he had for breakfast. Although John…

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5 thoughts on “My codependent “marriage” to a narcissistic boss.

  1. I had a boss who was something like that. I was actually a temp with floating responsibilities until The Asshole picked me for his secretary and whipping-girl. It was unreal. I never had a second in which I could complete an action or even a thought. He was constantly buzzing me. He would unjustly accuse me of having made a mistake. I don’t remember the details but I know it was a constant assault on my senses. Like a wind storm. At least, my “marriage” didn’t last so long. I made a formal complaint. Of course, anyone could have predicted the result. They took his side and fired me.

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