Okay, Tony Burgess, happy now?


Tony Burgess wrote a post telling me to post something new right now. I was going to take a night off, but now I’ll feel guilty if I don’t, so here’s a new post.

I was a weird, sketchy kid who had weird dreams. When I was about 5 I had a dream about something called a “clout” that looked like an oversized steel wool pad. It was sitting on the small rug in front of my bed and I was too scared to put my feet on the floor because that clout thing was evil. It just sat there on the rug, in all its black malevolence, not moving, but I knew it was alive and meant to kill me.   I knew if I put my feet on the floor the clout would suck me down into the Hell-portal it must have come from.

When I was around  the same age, one morning I woke up doubled over with laughter.   My dad asked me why I was laughing, and I remember saying, “someone was throwing mud at my door.”   I pointed to the door of my room and globs of gooey mud were sliding down its painted surface. I couldn’t stop shrieking with mirth.   I kept pointing but he couldn’t see the mud and told me to stop making things up.  “Look!  Look! There! There!” I screamed in frustration, but I was still laughing.   Then I woke up for real and was almost afraid if I looked at the door, mud would be on it. I was really awake this time, so there wasn’t. Relieved, I went downstairs for my Cap’n Crunch and orange juice.

Like I said, I was a weird kid.

5 thoughts on “Okay, Tony Burgess, happy now?

  1. Yup, that’s weird. 😀

    I had weird dreams as a kid, too. When I was four, my dad, who was then in the process of becoming a minister, decided that televisions were evil, because of the “dancing girls.” So he got rid of the TV. Then when I was 12, one of my dad’s alternate personalities took over — he was a multiple — and that’s when my dad quit the ministry, started drinking and smoking, and bought a TV. For the first time in 8 years, we had a TV to watch.

    That’s when I started having dreams that were interrupted by commercials. I would be dreaming along like normal, then my dream would cut to a commercial, and after the commercial my dream would resume, until another commercial came on.

    I remember one dream where the commercial intteruptions were all the same. The commercials in that dream were all for Brillo Soap Pads!

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    • You should get a cut from the Brillo company for providing them with free advertising in your dreams.
      When I was 4 I used to think there were little people living inside the TV. But probably all little kids think that lol.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Oh, me too, I remember when I was two years old, looking all around, behind, and under the TV trying to figure out how the tiny people got inside. Like there had to be a door or something, LOL.

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