I’m frustrated.

For old times’ sake–

This article was my first big “win” after I started this blog. I only had this blog for 8 days at the time I wrote this post. I’m not the world’s most patient person, and was frustrated and discouraged because my blog had no visibility and I only had 12 followers, and no likes or comments to speak of. It was so disheartening to work on a post all night, and in the morning I’d find nothing but crickets and tumbleweeds under the post. So I wrote this whiny little rant.

OM (Opinionated Man, for those of you who might not know him by his famous initials) , decided to help me out and reblog it. Because OM is hugely popular with an enormous following (51,000 followers last I saw) , I was overloaded with views, comments, likes and new followers that day. It kept me so busy all weekend I practically got nothing else done!
After this happened, there was no stopping me. I was hooked.

I have also worked very, very hard to get this blog to where it is now. At first I had to force myself to write and sometimes it was a chore. But I kept at it, and soon it wasn’t work anymore it was play. November’s Nano Poblano challenge helped a lot. But even by then I was writing 2-3 posts a day. Now I average 4-5!

Other people do the work of getting it out there for me by sharing it on social media, even if you don’t like social media yourself. Making sure to have all available social media buttons under each post is essential for that. People probably won’t bother “sharing” your post it those buttons aren’t there.

Then there is the matter of connecting with the right people, or having the right people discover your blog and promote it. Sam Vaknin has a lot to do with this blog’s growing success, but I didn’t recruit him for that task. I just lucked out by writing one well timed article about him he happened to like (if you can call a mutually beneficial arrangement with a malignant narcissist/borderline psychopath a lucky thing). Now he’s here all the time and reads everything, even if he doesn’t comment (I can tell by how many views per day are from Macedonia).

Connecting with other bloggers, especially popular ones, helps a lot too. Fivehundredpoundpeep at Blogspot has me on her blogroll now that we’ve become friends and her blog is pretty popular so I get a lot “referrees” from there. This blog also appears on Narcwriters at Blogspot and people come here from there too. The stats give so much information it’s mindboggling.

Everything else just has to do with hard work and writing as much as you can. If I don’t feel like writing (because sometimes I don’t) I still will post something short or cute, a video or a photo. I also make every effort to answer all my comments. Even if a blog has the best written articles outside of Pulitzer Prize winners, if an admin ignores comments (or doesn’t allow comments, which is something I will never understand), that makes visitors feel ignored and eventually they will get bored and go away. No one wants to be ignored.
Lively discussions are the key to any successful blog.

If you told me in September this blog would have grown as much as it has in this amount of time (I even qualify to run ads on the site now due to a sufficient amount of traffic) I would have laughed in your face and called you deluded.

Now the sky’s the limit.

Lucky Otters Haven


I started my blog a week ago as a form of self therapy and didn’t care if anyone read my stuff. Or didn’t think I cared. But I admit it: I do.

I read a lot of other blogs here at WordPress and some of them have thousands of followers and hundreds of comments for each post. Of course I realize most of these people have been at WordPress for a long time, and naturally those people will have more followers and comments than a newbie. Some of them may be professional bloggers who have paid for SEO and know all sorts of tricks I don’t to increase the numbers of hits they get.

But all that said, I still find it frustrating and disheartening when I spend hours writing a post and then another hour or so editing and trying to make it look great, only to come back…

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10 thoughts on “I’m frustrated.

    • He’s great with new bloggers. I think that’s probably unusual, because I think bloggers tend to be competitive. He WANTS new bloggers to be successful.


  1. OM was one of the first to notice my blog as well, and that was when I literally did nothing to try to interact, only vent on a blog. He is the unrecognized welcomming party of wordpress. Older post, still loved reading it again.

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  2. Hey, great advice. How do you put the “share” buttons at the bottom?
    I’m an adoptive mom of a possibly Aspie son and his sister, who has Reactive Attachment Disorder. We’ve had him evaluated (he was 6 and then 7 at time of eval; now he’s 8) and the first was a definite YES but the next psych eval (by a different individual) came out borderline. Either way, he’s brilliant.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I had to look this up myself, it’s been so long since I set up my share buttons.
      Go to your Dashboard, then look for the Settings tab, click that on and then click on Sharing. Drag the buttons you want (I used them all) from “Sharing Buttons” to the bottom of the screen (enabled services). You can also set it up to automatically link your posts to a few services such as Twitter or FB (mine automatially link to Twitter and that shows up in my feed).

      I think many Borderlines are Aspies and vice versa. I was actually diagnosed with BPD in 1996. I don’t think I am anymore, but I may have been back then (I was actually hospitalized for 3 months, and got a dx of Bipolar (Axis I), PTSD and general anxiety (Axis II) and Borderline Personality Disorder (Axis III). No one suspected Aspergers yet, not even myself. Later on I self-identified as having Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD).
      My daughter is almost exactly the same as I was in 1996 but the jury’s out on whether she’s BPD or NPD. I hope it’s “just” BPD, though that’s no picnic either. She’s also not Aspie or Avoidant. She is a social butterfly, unlike me.

      I think most people with Aspergers are very intelligent. I’ve actually heard it called “Geek Syndrome.” It does fit with the stereotype of the nerd or geek.

      Liked by 1 person

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