I hate living in a country where so many people think my son is abomination who deserves to die.


Pride Parade, New York City, 2019

Just this past week, I read this and this (a video of Fritts’ disgusting sermon calling for the execution of LGBTQ people is linked in the article, if you can stand to watch it).   I felt literally sick to my stomach after reading these articles (and watching that awful video) and almost had to vomit.

Fritts, the homophobic police officer, has since been relieved of his duties, but it’s the first article that’s really disturbing.   A group of “Christian” preachers are having a “Make America Straight Again” event in Orlando, Florida, in response to “Pride Week.”    Last I heard, free speech was still legal in America, so of course people have the right to express homophobic opinions.  But what’s really chilling is that one of the preachers leading the event is praying for violence against the LGBTQ community during their Pride events being held in the same city!   Not only that, but several of the scheduled speakers will be speaking about their belief in the mass extermination of LGBTQ people.   That sounds like something the Nazis or some of the Middle Eastern countries under Sharia Law would do.  It chills me to the bone that this sort of thing is becoming increasingly acceptable and normalized here in America.

What kind of person prays for violence or even death against a group that isn’t violent themselves, but who merely have a lifestyle some believe is sinful?   A person full of hate and violence, that’s who.  Certainly not a follower of Christ.

These are far from the only incidents of blatant homophobia infiltrating the law and politics in this country.  Like everything else that’s bad and rotten, it’s gotten worse under Trump.   He emboldens homophobia, misogyny, and racism, partly because of his hatred for these groups of people, but it’s also a big part of his efforts to appease the religious right, who apparently believe Trump is their magic genie.  They feed his massive ego by diefying him and telling him he’s anointed by God and above the law,  and he gives them what they want.   Easy peasy.   It doesn’t take a genius to figure out why Trump gives the religious right what they want, and it has nothing to do with him being somehow “God’s chosen” or caring about “morality.”   Trump’s lifestyle has been and continues to be one of the most immoral (or is it amoral?) I’ve ever seen, and he’s never shown an ounce of repentance.  He’s a hypocrite who does whatever gives him power and wealth.  The only fruit he bears is rotten.


True morality isn’t about what women do with their bodies or what gender you’re allowed to love anyway.  It’s about the way you treat others.  I’m sure Jesus would agree.  Every day he showed the most vulnerable people and the marginalized nothing but kindness and acceptance, including the sinners.   It was the dominionists of his time — the wealthy and powerful Pharisees who demanded strict obedience in the name of God — that he condemned.

My son is gay.  He is also one of the kindest, sweetest, funniest people I have ever known.  He has brought so much joy to my life, and the lives of his friends.    He is a wonderful, talented, and intelligent human being who is empathetic,  has never hurt anyone else intentionally, and who also, like many gay people, struggled emotionally with his sexual identity before he was able to “come out.”

I don’t believe being gay is a choice.  No one just wakes up one morning and says, “Gee, I think I want to be gay” (or bi, or transgender, or what have you).  I don’t think a gay person can be “cured” any more than a tiger can change its stripes.   To think there are so many hateful people in this country — including people with enough political power to change laws — who want him dead or think he’s an abomination because of his sexual preference fills me with existential dread.   Now that these homophobic nutjobs have been emboldened by Trump’s “war on political correctness” and open hatred, and his shameless pandering to the religious right in exchange for their financial support and deification of him,  I’m actually becoming terrified for my son’s safety.

There are dominionist politicians high in government right now who are packing the courts with far right judges willy nilly, and I’m afraid they may well succeed in their efforts to turn America into a theocracy ruled by biblical (Old Testament) law (the “Christian” version of Sharia law).  I hope that if the United States continues in the dark direction it seems to be headed, my son can find a way to leave the country.  In the meantime, I pray for his safety.  America no longer feels safe.


17 thoughts on “I hate living in a country where so many people think my son is abomination who deserves to die.

  1. I can’t believe that such hate as these people spew can come out of any decent theology. It must come from some unfathomable, existential fear and dread from a core I don’t understand, a cancer of the soul.

    Liked by 2 people

    • It’s not a decent theology: it’s right wing evangelical “Christianity” aka Christian Nationalism, aka dominionism, and it’s demonic to the core.
      You are correct: it is absolutely based on fear which manifests as hatred toward the “Other.”

      Christian nationalism/dominionism isn’t so much a religion as a fascist political agenda wrapped up in a religion. Religion is a handy tool used to oppress others, and it has been used this way throughout history: The Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, the Salem witch trials, Islamic extremism are just a few examples. The Nazis and the slaveholders during the Civil war also used Christianity as a theological basis for their evil agenda. It isn’t lost on me that it’s Christianity that’s behind most of these atrocities. I’m not sure what that means.

      The dominionist/right wing evangelical belief system, which holds to a perpetually angry and punishing God (who might as well be Satan!), is based mainly on Leviticus and Romans 13 and pretty much throws out the entire Gospels and the Sermon on the Mount, and even the Ten Commandments (thou shalt love your neighbor as yourself, thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not bear false witness, and maybe others ). It is to true Christianity what ISIS or the Taliban is to true Islam. Religious zealotry has caused more wars and human misery than perhaps anything else that has afflicted humankind. These people are dangerous and evil. They are false prophets preaching a false gospel. They even call themselves “prophets” and “apostles,” lifting themselves above the rest of humanity and giving themselves permission to oppress others based on their “anointing.” This is unbiblical and about as far away from Jesus as you can get. Jesus condemned people like this.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I have a gay stepson and his dad and I love him dearly. These people calling for the execution of LGBTQ people are evil. They may call themselves Christians, but they are not.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. It is, without a doubt, one of the scariest times in our country’s history. The people with open minds and arms, the ones loving people harder and screaming it from rooftops are in a constant state of unsettled worry. I can’t imagine how your son must feel. I’ll think of and pray for your sons safety everyday.

    Liked by 2 people

    • He deals with it by burying himself in work, and making/watching films and videos. He doesn’t exactly ignore the news, but he doesn’t like to talk about it. He hates talking politics, so I don’t bring it up with him. I’m sure the hatred directed at LGBTQ people bothers him a lot. (His partner is transgender). He tries to keep a positive attitude and a sense of humor, and that keeps him from sinking into depression, but his anxiety level is actually very high.

      I am definitely in a constant state of unsettled worry. Not just for myself and my son (and my daughter, but for other reasons), but for the people of this country, the world (this shit’s spreading to other countries, it’s not just here), and the planet itself, which these people have no regard for, and treat like it’s their personal toxic waste dump.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Hatred is exhausting. I’m not perfect by any stretch and have struggled with bitterness and borderline hate toward situations and people. However, I also examine my behavior and try to be more peaceful and peaceable, because it physically hurts to hate…at least, it does me., I don’t want to hate, and I don’t think it’s ever done a lick of good. I cannot think of a single instance where hate toward a group of people made things better.

    Where does this wellspring of hatred come from? I would love to know, because it must be exhausting for all these people to hate so much.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I think it’s been here for a very long time, and Trump has given these haters permission to hate openly. Now it’s becoming normalized, and that’s very dangerous for democracy and for our country. Anyone who isn’t white, straight, male, Christian, and Republican is fair game for abuse and demonization by the Trump regime. We already have concentration camps for migrant families and children. I suspect the roundups will continue and soon include other marginalized groups, most likely journalists, political dissenters, or LGBTQ people.

      Liked by 1 person

      • That’s why I was always signing petitions when they came up for review, even for things I didn’t totally support myself. But I knew other people might support it. I did that because of the slippery slope. I kept thinking “if they’re allowed to do this, what will happen next?” And then I’d sign to keep options open. This was back when I was anti-abortion and relatively Christian, but I figured there were people out there–not like me–who may need this thing others are trying to ban or change.
        But this crap here–this is a call to violence. I wanted to throw up when I saw that one preacher smiling and giggling when talking about “if there’s a problem” and that Florida is a Stand Your Ground state. Geez, can only wonder what he was thinking about in that moment. Shameful. Shameful. Shameful. And he’s a man of God?
        Stuff like this is why I ran as far as I could from religion!
        I know people who don’t support gay rights, but they aren’t frothing at the mouth with hate. Their attitude is it’s between the gay person and Jesus when they die, nobody else need interfere or get in their face about it.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. People are gay for many reasons. If one is born gay, I believe God is fine with them finding someone to love and they shouldn’t be condemned to a life of celibacy and loneliness. But, there are other reasons people turn gay later in life. Usually it is because of childhood sexual abuse or an addiction to pornography. Medication can also cause this change. In these cases, these individuals should seek healing for their problems. Often linked to those homosexuals who become gay later in life for these reasons is criminal activity, like the story I read recently of a lesbian couple who tore off their child’s sexual organ because they wanted him to be gay too. Anybody in their right mind would condemn this kind of behavior as psychotic and criminal and not normal. We in society don’t have our heads on straight and our hearts in the right places. If a person is born gay and they find a soul mate and they live quietly in their house for the rest of their life, so? I think God is angry at a lot of others beside them, but when you dance naked in the streets, are a pedophile, or cut off other’s organs, someone has to speak out about that. I believe you are right to condemn these “Christians” saying others should be killed. Clearly their hearts are not right with God. Satan comes to steal, kill, destroy and CONFUSE. And we live in the land of confusion. Encourage your son to be who he is, but to obey laws and do good, and God will be just fine with him.


  6. It is beautiful to see that you accept your son’s sexuality. It is wonderful and may be because of your acceptance he had the courage to come out and not spoil many lives by marrying or dating a woman.

    God is far above to judge someone on the basis of sexuality. I hope people see sense.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I don’t have enough time to write in details all the thoughts reading this post has provoked in me… I might write a whole post of my own, and link it in sometime soon instead, not to flood your comment box 😉

    I am tired of the concept of ”accepting” LGBT people. I don’t feel anyone should feel good that they ”accept” difference. When I hear people claiming they ”accept” LGBT people, it always sounds to me that difference is bad, and they like these people despite the fact that that they are not ”normal”…

    My brother is gay (and I have many LGBT people in my family and friend circle), and when he finaly made his coming out a couple of years back (he is in his thirties), he broke in tears in my and my mother’s arms, obviously terrified that he was disappointing us. I hugged him, and told him the only thing I had on my mind, at that moment: ”I’m glad you got it off your chest, but it doesn’t change anything for me!”

    I feel for all the people who have to live daily in lies and fear, because ignorant people make them feel like living abominations. And it makes my teeth cringe to hear people who claim they speek in the name of a God, call for judgement upon people who have already suffered too much for too long.

    I hope this hate will not keep growing in the US… For people like your son, his partner, and for families like yours that have to live with the fear that they will be hunted down and discriminated because of ignorance.

    If it ever gets worse, tell your son we’ll have a place for him in Canada! There are *ssholes everywhere, but I think that life for LGBT people is pretty good, here in Montréal 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  8. It sounds so strange ” one of the preachers leading the event is praying for violence against the LGBTQ community during their Pride events being held in the same city!” this being totally against the teaching of the one who Christians should follow, namely the Nazarene Jewish rebbe Jeshua (Jesus Christ) who was a preacher of non-violence and love for all people.

    Liked by 1 person

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