This brilliant post ponders on the question all of us who have ever been in a narcissistic relationship (or had narcissistic parents) have asked: can a narcissist feel love? This deeply personal post says yes, they can. But they have no idea how to express their love in appropriate ways because everything, especially loving someone, hurts too much. So they hurt the one they love instead so they don’t have to feel all that pain.
You can’t reason with them or plead with them to stop doing what they do, though. Attacking you isn’t something they can control — it’s an automatic reaction, almost like a reflex. Whether or not a narcissist is capable of FEELING love, they don’t know how to EXPRESS it in a loving way, so you’re better off not wasting your own love trying to make a relationship with one work. If you must love a narcissist, do it from a safe distance.
“The heart dies a slow death. Shedding each hope like leaves, until one day there are none. No hopes. Nothing remains.”
The Narcissist Loves you in their heart, but hates you in their mind.
This statement apparently runs contrary to everything that’s known about Narcissism. I mean, Narcissists are incapable of basic empathy, let alone Love, right? It’s been established over and over. If they were capable of Love, they would not be by definition Narcs. Yet, Narcissistic Personality Disorder is classified as a Cluster B disorder-which is a group of highly emotional and erratic disorders.
Volatile emotions such as anger are familiar to Narcs because those are well traveled neural pathways; the rest are less developed, produced shallow positive emotions such as happiness and Love. I recall when I was a cute innocent fifteen year old HSP/Empath traipsing around with my Narc. My greatest fear before I…
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