What a narcissistic parent sounds like.

Here are two Youtube videos that graphically show exactly how a mother with a bad case of NPD (malignant narcissism) operates. These videos are entertaining in a scary and disturbing way, like watching a train wreck.

Pay close attention to what the mother says–she uses every trick in the narcissist’s book of tricks: blame, insults, changing the subject, interrupting, raging, mocking, “talking over”, gaslighting, projecting, invading boundaries, not taking responsibility, showing no empathy, and just about every other “tool” the narcissist uses to get their own way or avoid taking responsibility for their behavior and actions. Notice how childish the overall effect is–the mother sounds like a four year old having a temper tantrum.

The daughter who made the videos is trying hard to get her mother to listen, but her words seem to fall on deaf ears. She might as well be talking to a wall, for all the good it does.

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30 thoughts on “What a narcissistic parent sounds like.

  1. Oh my…
    The word I’m done rings a bell with me. Narcs love to throw that word around. I used it in my song lyrics. I’m done…I told you I was done before, Now let me be done with you so you can move on.

    And the Narc mom is terribly obsessed with details in the kitchen. The garbage bag has to be inside another garbage bag. If you wash a dish…its washed incorrectly. I you dont wash the dish they complain your using them as a slave. Your damed if you do and damed if you don’t.

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        • Yep. There’s no such thing as going too far with narcs. The mocking thing too–my ex always used to do that. It’s engineered to drive you into a frenzy of frustration and rage. Theres’ no way to get through to them.

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          • Oh…I understand. So they are actually trying to push your buttons. I did a pretty good job…until I blew up on email. My problem is I dont react on the stop. I think about the insults. They fester. Then I blow up weeks later on the Narc. When you think about it,…the Narc has stupid insults. My Narc told me I was going to age rapidly because my skin in whiter than his. That’s a really silly thing to say to someone. Think about it? He’s insulting me about something that he’s predicting will occur based on our ethnic backgrounds. Very very immature….to actually focus on who will age at a faster rate?? And the insults come out of nowhere. Its a sunny afternoon. Everything is going smooth… Then bang… Something obnoxious comes out of the Narc. Why? Who knows. Something they saw…or something you say gives them pathological envy. They just can’t help themselves.

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  2. I think I only made it through two minutes of both. It was like being back with my ex all over again. It’s good now, though, because I can hear that and realise it’s wrong and then process it accordingly- aka, get the hell out of there and don’t go back!! Ugh. Thanks for posting these- I’m so glad I escaped all of this. X

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  3. It would be easy for anyone to think that this was just a fight that Taylor and her mother were having, and got along very well the rest of the time. I can see even my former self believing that. Even the nature of the narcissist can be overlooked at times, and its hard to see past that into the truth.

    Her mother had no respect or caring for her daughter. I can see now even the “good times” would have been more of the gaslighting, the lying, etc. Her mother can’t be trusted to say anything good. This trumps all the good. I’m not sure if I can explain it.

    I hope Taylor has gone no contact. This is horrible treatment. This mother is no mother at all. Any appeasing to her mother got her more of the same mean treatment. Oh the lies are beyond horrible. But I am glad that Taylor was trying to stand up for herself, even though it didn’t matter and made things worse. I never got to the point of standing up for myself. I wish I did. But I know that it wouldn’t have mattered for me either.

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    • I heard it again today. I can’t even stay calm through it. The complaints run through everything from soup to nuts. I even flipped the phone and said…knock it off and watch what a narcissistic parent sounds like.

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        • Thank God…its triggering in a good way. I just realized that my sister knows that anything she says will be repeated back to me by my mother. So she manipulates my mother. I’m totally at peace with my brothers. We get along just fine. But my little sister uses my mother in attempt to try to distract everyone from what they do, and their happiness.

          Awareness…gives you the knowledge you need to secure your own happiness, and recognize distractions.

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          • Triggering in a good way for sure. Yes it felt bad, but it came with acknowledgement that I wasn’t making this stuff up. It is very frightening but very real.

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    • There is no love there at all. I watched this a few times trying to find one good or loving thing about the mother toward Taylor and could find nothing. Obviously Taylor is the scapegoat in this family. Even down to the threat at the end about selling the house and leaving Taylor with nothing. I hate this woman. I think she’s actually a psychopath.

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    • They spin the argument in circles, and it goes nowhere. Although I am surprised. I just explored my mother’s relationship with her own mother. My mother was a straight A student who use to beg her mother to sign her perfect report card. My mother had to forge her mothers signature on her own report card, because her mother would not sign it. Her mother forced her to quit school and work a job at the local sewing factory. My grandmother stole my mothers entire paycheck and put it in a bank account for her sons. My mother was very smart and artistic. Later on she would make my clothes and sew me a raggety Ann doll.

      My father designed the stage propts and scenes for the schools local theatre production. The school teacher would not credit his work and would tell him to his face, “I hate poor kids”. Dad was an Italian immigrant that came from a more upscale section of Italy in the Abresese section, not far from Rome. Moms heritage migrated from the Calbrese section (known to be migrant farmers). Sometimes I think the migration from Italy to the US wasn’t the best life for the children. I really don’t know? But I am sure its a double whammy and a serious injury to the child’s self esteem to grow up believing they are less than others because they are the last generation to migrate into the US.

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      • Go look onto your inbox. Important message I learned about Narc parents. It is highly, likely that the sense of smell is what attracts us to other narcs. I am pretty sure that most narc parents are clean freak obsessed. This is a part of narcisism we haven’t explored. The sense of smell.

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  4. Goodness..very triggering indeed….Generally I can feel the girl’s pain! What a horrible mother and yes I know the feeling very well of talking to a wall! That was my childhood too..Not feeling heard at all and having insults thrown at me…Such horrible people..No contact is the best way, with these types of narcs..

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  5. Reblogged this on Lucky Otter's Haven and commented:

    I’m sure a lot of victims of narcissist parents will be able to relate to this graphic example of how a mother with obviously high spectrum NPD abuses, mocks, and scapegoats her daughter. Warning: these videos may be triggering.

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  6. Pingback: What a narcissistic parent sounds like. | living in stigma

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