Mystery package!

package

It drives me crazy when I get one of those orange slips from the Post Office saying I got a package or certified letter but am not there to sign for it. Being the worrywart and catastrophizer I am, I always imagine the worst. Is the IRS auditing me? Did someone die? Is it an eviction notice?   What kind of bad news is it anyway?  I mean, it HAS to be bad news.  Right? What else could it be?

Well, to be fair, I’ve also received certified letters for JUNK MAIL.  Those just get thrown out when I finally go to the trouble of driving to the post office and turn in my slip.  And then I get really mad.  Why are they wasting my time (and theirs)?  Why would anyone send junk mail that way anyway?  So, it could be that.  It could be junk mail. Please God, let it be junk mail.   I’d rather be annoyed than get bad news.

I was actually sleeping when the notice came. I think I remember hearing a vague knock on the door, but I wasn’t awake enough to register it in my head as something real at the door.

nervous

Of COURSE, when I woke up, it was 10 minutes past twelve, ten minutes too late for me to go to the post office to fetch whatever catastrophic news I was about to receive. And of COURSE, the Sender was left blank.  Grrrrr. So I went online to the USPS website and typed in the long number on the back of the slip.  I HAD TO KNOW.

Well.  It turned out the sender is from the city where my dad lived and his wife still lives. You may recall my dad passed away June 6th of last year. I still have no idea what I received, but I’m thinking it might be some of the old pictures of me and other things I’d requested from his wife months ago. Maybe it’s even that pastel portrait of me at age six! I’ve wanted that for a long time but I was sure it was thrown out with the trash. It still may have been. I still have no idea what  I’m getting, but at least now I know where it’s coming from so it most likely has something to do with my dad.

I really hope I’m getting some of those old pictures or my portrait. Fingers crossed!

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About luckyotter

This blog is my journal. I just choose to share it with the world instead of keeping everything inside my head. I'm a recovering Borderline and have also struggled with Avoidant Personality Disorder. I also have Complex PTSD due to having been the victim of narcissistic abuse for most of my life. I write mostly about narcissism, because I was the child of a narcissistic mother, and then married to a sociopathic malignant narcissist for 20 years. But there's a silver lining too. In some ways they taught me about myself. This blog is about all that. Not all my articles will be about NPD, BPD or other personality disorders or mental conditions. I pretty much write about whatever's on my mind at the moment. So there's something for everyone here. Blogging about stuff is crack for my soul. It's self therapy, and hopefully my insights and observations may help others too.
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12 Responses to Mystery package!

  1. Wolfgirl says:

    I hope it is too! And I’m glad it’s not any bad news 🙂 I tend to worry that I’m going to hear the worst too, when usually I don’t. Don’t know when I’ll learn, lol.

    Liked by 1 person

    • luckyotter says:

      It’s silly isn’t it? Because usually it isn’t anything bad. But it’s those negative tapes that were programmed into us from an early age.

      Like

      • Wolfgirl says:

        Yeah, programming is hard to fight. One thing I remember reading years ago that helped me a lot was that worry is where your mind starts to wear a little groove, a little track it just naturally falls into whenever you’re not thinking about anything else, and the only way to fix that is to wear it another groove of more positive thoughts so it can fall into that track instead. I imagine that’s kind of the same as mindfulness therapy (which I’ve heard you mention)?

        Liked by 1 person

  2. nowve666 says:

    When I lived in Berkeley, the postal person was always leaving those slips even when I was home and awake. The lazy sod didn’t want to bother walking up three stories to deliver the package so I had the inconvenience of having to go downtown to get it. I complained a lot and they did get better.

    Here’s the difference between a psychopath and a borderline. You were fearful of bad news. I was excited about getting something good. We are really into reward.

    Now all mail is delivered to the front desk so I never get those damned slips again.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. nikitalondon says:

    I am always afraid of speed fines so hight sent to the court 😳😳😳
    let us know what it is

    Liked by 1 person

  4. rubycommenting says:

    I know what you mean about catastrophizing, we were conditioned to be that way. But yes, it probably is some of the items you requested, maybe more. Let us know.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Yara Aiko says:

    Did you ever figure out what it was?

    Liked by 1 person

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