At least for me the above statement holds true.  It’s hard for me to explain in terms that someone who has not been shaken by violence at the hands of an intimate partner can understand.  We all know logically what acts and words are demonstrative of love and those that are not.  Further, we all know what constitutes abuse.  However, your view of normal shifts drastically from pre-abuse to post-abuse.

I am addressing this, because it seems to be one of the things people ask me most to clarify.  They usually misunderstand me when I say this as meaning that the act of being abused itself is normal, but that really is not the case.  I can explain this a million times, but if those listening fail to look at it from my perspective, it will be futile.

When the abuse first begins, it appears to be something harmless and…