I am not defending psychopaths.

Someone has accused me of defending psychopaths because of the question I posted the other day wondering if there might be any “good” psychopaths. In case there’s any question, I think I need to explain a couple of things because I don’t believe that at all.

1. It was simply a random thought that popped into my head. I do not, and never have, thought of ANY psychopaths as good people, and I have never known one.

2. It was a question, not a statement or even an opinion. I just wanted to know what other people thought.

I have strange thoughts at times. Sometimes they even border on crazy. You can take that or leave it. I don’t mind constructive criticism (in fact I welcome it), but I dislike being pigeonholed and blanket judgments being made about me based on one random post. I never once said or even implied that psychopathy is a good thing. I don’t think it is.
Some people really misunderstand my motives. I guess I shouldn’t let that get to me but it does. People are too quick to judge.

20 thoughts on “I am not defending psychopaths.

  1. We live in an instantly stupid society, quick to argue, judge, defame. A simple question is not a defense of evil, but, in your case, it was an attempt to provoke conversation. Good for you. Personally, I believe that the phrase “good psychopath” is an oxymoron. That said, I also suspect that many sociopaths may have good qualities, on occasion–politicians, military leaders, scientists…

    Liked by 2 people

    • I’m glad you and others here can see wht I was really trying to say (or rather ask!) I think our society has become almost intolerably judgmental and blaming–and there are too many bullies out in the world, pointing fingers and just assuming things that aren’t true based on nothing. I’m so tired of it, and I’m so tired of always feeling like I have to defend myself. Sometimes my high sensitivity is a real problem. Sometimes I wish I didn’t CARE so much what others think. As a blogger, I need to stop caring so much what other people think, because I am going to have critics no matter what.

      Liked by 3 people

      • It took me decades to learn that I would have critics no matter what (long before the net or blogging). So, I follow someone’s sage advice: only apologize if you have said or done something that hurts/injures someone. Do not apologize if some loser takes offence or wants to blame your for their own problems. Everyone these days pretends victimhood so they can blame others for their own bad lives & decisions. Ignore idiots, always. It is hurtful to fend off unearned accusations, but recognize that, in this case, ignorance is bliss. I spent the better part of my young life apologizing for things that were not my fault. Things did not change. I accept responsibility only for things I have done that harm others. It is not my responsibility to fix someone else’s karma. That’s my free advice, worth the price of admission (?).

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I was waiting for that. People on line are the same as they are irl. They don’t read and they don’t listen. They come to their own conclusions sometimes based on nothing, and or by what they THINK they read or heard.

    That’s a general statement though and not everyone is like that of course.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Exactly. The trouble is, I’m always so quick to jump on the defensive. It’s due to the way I was raised, always in the victim role. I should just let petty little comments and finger wagging know-nothing disapproval roll off my back, but as an HSP it gets to me. I try to hard to please everyone and wind up pleasing no one. I’m writing a post about my defensiveness later. Thank you for the kind words.

      Liked by 2 people

      • I relate. I can be the same way too. My biggest problem is freezing though. It’s nice though online or through technology of any kind really, you can think about what you wanna say in response. 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

        • Yes! It’s so much easier online–IRL I clam up like you do and don’t speak up for myself (unless I am in a rage which doesn’t happen much anymore–then I say TOO much!) Sometimes I feel like I have to apologize for my existence. Online, I don’t–but I still hate it when people misunderstand or misconstrue my words–or just want to be assholes.

          Liked by 1 person

  3. If my memory is right, you asked if any psychopaths “do” any good, not if they “were” good.

    I’ve read where Hamas is very popular with the locals in the Middle East because they work hard to provide services and food to many communities . They’re an evil , murderous terror group that does good. Like your post so nimbly brought out, good can be from a very sinister motive.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. One time I made a statment in general at work: how sometimes misunderstand workers, fire them and the workers go crazy by coming back
    with aggressive acts ( shoot them) I was labled as a “sothing wrong with her!” By someone that is not able to handle controversabe conversations. She used it in my evaluation!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I have found that just by virtue of running a blog that there will be people who want to stir up trouble. If it’s someone simply stating their opinion, I approve the comment and let other readers respond to it. If it’s a comment that directly attacks me, I simply delete it. I’ve been called everything from a victim-blamer, man-hater, narc-sympathizer, feminist (though I do believe in equal rights for women), to snake oil pusher. That’s when I remind myself that what people say about me has more to do with them than with me.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hi, Kim! No, it wasn’t a comment here, and I do allow differing opinions here and will approve them. This was post written by another blogger.
      I’ve been called all the things you have been (except feminist) and called a narcissist as well. Definitely narc-hugger, because of the fact I think of narcissism as a spectrum disorder and don’t think all of them are completely without hope or completely evil. I see things in shades of grey, but some people do not, and then they demonize me because I think differently than they do.

      Shockingly, one of the most supportive remarks I received about this whole drama was in an email from one of the self-proclaimed narcissists who sometimes write to me for help. Of course, this person showed what appeared to be a lot of empathy, so it’s very possible this person isn’t a narcissist at all but thinks they are one.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Eh. My psychopath father is currently in the process of dying. I’ve been low to no contact for almost 3 yrs, but I’m currently losing all of my large, extended family because the new slander is I’ve dumped my parents because they are now in need and I’m selfish and lazy.

    ……………this line of questioning is actually helping me not lose my mind right now . How? Because if we as scapegoats deny the reality that horrific people do amazing things for selfish sometimes, evil reasons, then the whole covert triangulation , target, monkey syndrome makes no sense at all.

    My adult sibs and nephews and nieces, cousins are for the most part good people. The reason they love my father so much is he has done wonderful things for many of them, repeatly, with a generosity of spirit that makes his treatment of me completely unbelievable.

    So many undisordered flying monkeys are completely duped, not just by mental propaganda , but also tangible “love” and “charity” from the psychopath .

    If my father had treated me with even half the goodness I wouldn’t have a clue right now of his true nature. The depths of his cruelty, his capacity for evil, his thirst for suffering would be truly lost on me.

    Anyway , for what it’s worth , that’s why I read your blog. It takes these already complex , outrageous issues up into an even higher level of understanding. Some people are on so much pain, are so busy, they can’t percieve these concepts or interweave them into the already web like experiences they’ve endured.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks for sharing that, Alex. I like to explore ideas, and look at all facets of things. Some people can’t or won’t understand that. Some think I just analyze everything too much (which I do).
      I’m sorry you were scapegoated by your psychopathic father. Probably because he knew you could see the truth about him, while your siblings could not. They were blinded by his generosity to them.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I think I know how you feel. I seem to have a knack for being misunderstood, and whether people misunderstand me deliberately (as happens sometimes) or because I failed to make my point sufficiently well, it’s irritating. My impulse is to keep explaining myself, in the hope that if I explain what I mean well enough, they’ll understand, but this seldom has the desired effect. If someone actually understands what I said, and then disagrees, I can deal with that; but when they misunderstand me, and then go off on an insulting rampage against what they THINK I said… well, that’s just infuriating.

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    • I relate to this 100%. I often feel like I have to waste so much time explaining myself, because something I said was taken out of context, but you know what? If someone wants to believe something about you, they are going to “read into” whatever you say no matter what. It is very infuriating, I agree.

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      • Also, on this matter of “defending” psychopaths (or any other evil people): that is a very silly accusation. No one in his or her right mind defends evil. But some people are only too eager to jump all over anyone they perceive as being insufficiently outraged by evil.

        I once made a comment to the effect that I didn’t find a certain character in a certain very well-known work of fiction believable, because he had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. The person I was talking to vehemently disagreed, insisting that some people are totally evil, citing Adolph Hitler (naturally!) as an example. I said, “How do you know he was totally evil? You didn’t know him. All you know is what other people have said and written about him.” The person I was arguing with was momentarily stumped, but then muttered something about how even if he (Hitler) DID have any redeeming qualities, the evil that he did completely outweighed anything positive. Which is true, but it didn’t refute my point, which was that every human being is a mixed bag. (I find it amusing that people will readily agree to the assertion that no one is perfect, but they freak out if you say that no one is totally evil.)

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